if i'm falling, i'll do it like an angel

Joined May 2017
256 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
girl who has to take the bus home off dat pinot grigio bc she spent wayyyy too much money on dyeing her hair
i’ve been at the salon for three and a half hours now, and we have yet to even apply the dye to my hair —— and after that we’ve still got like five more steps; this really is an all day process, my god
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liz lemon retweeted
you accidentally sign up for quora when you're 12 and they'll send you emails when you're on your deathbed too. i fucking BLOCKED them, how am i still getting these??? i'm 20 years old please Let It Go
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liz lemon retweeted
finally I can wait for my train in luxury
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walking into whole foods with a rambunctious toddler who’s been throwing tantrums all day, and a midsize dog who sheds likes there’s no tomorrow. feeling like a #menacetosociety
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two likes and I’ll midsommar bear him
oomf has flirted w litr every female on twitter
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puta, reformada
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kirkb your enthusiasm
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but also, like, be really excited for the woman you’ll become now that you’ve realized how you became someone you despise? instead of being an aimless narcissist?? productive self loathing!
miss the girl you used to be monday
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miss the girl you used to be monday
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liz lemon retweeted
Dont delete that tweet...This is twitter, Not quitter
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reddit paypigs vs twitter paypigs
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liz lemon retweeted
to share or not to share that is the real question
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Ariana Grande might just end up starving herself to death
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two ed related posts within the last hour and a half… EW EW EW
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buying new clothes instead of doing your laundry
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when he makes you rt him for exposure
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making me feel like a supportive little twitter wife
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drunkorexia 🤩
how are alcoholics so skinny if alcohol is so high in calories
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liz lemon retweeted
we need a Chicago world cup. Each team is made up of specific section of the city.
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telling my dog to look at me and listen whenever she barks at another dog
Just heard a white woman tell her dog “breathe through it” as the dog eyed a squirrel
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big booty chudette gets radicalized by wokecock
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