my peak in FG is top 8 in a tournament
my peak in shadowverse is grandmaster
my peak in ML is mythic rank
My peak in rhythm games are level(?) 11 in arcaea
now i wonder where's my peak in chess
Even though people don’t appreciate them because of the larpers, aren’t the IF stories genuinely excellent? Each one is uniquely engaging.
Most people either go, “Pride IF is so cool, even better than the main story!” or “All the IF stories are slop.” Very few actually appreciate them or understand their meaning.
these days I'm extremely melancholic
my depression is flaring up
up until i began having harmful thoughts again.....
I don't know what happened, and I don't know how to stop these phases.
I'm struggling to trust people until the last minute
i mean in the end I did get helped, but it feels like the last straw, that I decide I should get help from a real person, just to express myself, before I do something irreversible.
I wish I'm not scared at talking to people
starting the message is the hardest. Some people have different "lights" i noticed, some are yellow lights for me. While some looks like a green, it actually a red light thus I didn't ask their help.
I don't want to burden the person I cared about deeply...
y'all idk why i'm getting attacked by these buzzers 🥲 they literally don't get the point what i'm talking about here is ONLY about ART COMMISSION not something else duh get your brain omfg 🤦🏻
Underrated life advice: Stop beating yourself up for decisions your younger self made with less knowledge. Some things only make sense after you’ve lived them. Be proud of what you’ve learned, not ashamed of when you learned it. Seeing things differently now is a good thing.
If I say that "i just want to have friends" it'll be some kind of lie, since my actions has been proven otherwise.
Therefore, from the bottom of my heart my biggest wish is
i want to end
I live with effort and results. What I pour it in, it must be consistent with the results I seek.
For this week, what I do is isolating myself
I don't talk to people, and even if I do I just talked awkwardly