User called me this morning saying their mouse "isn't working right." I remote in. The mouse is fine. Their entire desktop is covered in 847 icons. Files, shortcuts, folders, screenshots, downloads, all just... everywhere. No organization. I ask when the last time they organized it was. They say "organized?" I tell them to move everything into a folder. They ask if I can do it remotely. I say yes, but they should learn to do this themselves. They say "that's what I'm paying you for." I select all 847 items and drag them to the trash. I tell them their mouse should work better now. They say it does work better. I close the ticket. They'll realize what I did in about three days when they can't find anything. They'll call me panicking. I'll tell them everything's in the Recycle Bin for 30 more days and I can restore it if they ask nicely. I know they won't ask nicely. They'll demand it. But I'll restore it anyway, and that will close another ticket, which gets me closer to my bonus. It's 11:00 AM. I have 23 more tickets. None of them are real problems. I'm going to lunch.

Brawl announcer: Snow Miser! Wii mote: I̷͌ͅ'̶̣̕m̵̝̑ ̴̼̊t̶̠̀o̷͚̔o̶̗̿ ̶̩̐m̵͍̿u̴̥͝c̸̖̚ḩ̷͗