I will never die

Joined January 2020
954 Photos and videos
29 Aug 2025
Hiberno-englishpilled folks do be using the continuous present tense also šŸ˜Ž yup
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26 Aug 2025
There are thousands of aborted coworkers in heaven who never got the chance to show you AI generated shark attack videos
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26 Aug 2025
Youre one of the most sensual coworkers I think I’ve ever had
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25 Aug 2025
PRANK: I left my FRIEND in a SEALED BOX with a VIAL of POISON???!! (GONE HYPOTHETICAL)
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beejay retweeted
16 Aug 2025
I lied to my taxi driver last night that I'm an archaeologist and now he's on his way over at noon with a curious rock fuuuuckkkkjkkk
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14 Aug 2025
Just came up with my dream blunt rotation and I’m not even in it
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14 Aug 2025
I weed in real life in my toilet this morning!
weed in real life:
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13 Aug 2025
The squid concerto I organised has been postponed due technical difficulti. Tentacles difficulty. Technincles
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Try smoking weed and eating some food… you can thank me later
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27 Jul 2025
I’m in your boyfriends dms like What an awesome Instagram story of your epic shoes my man!
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27 Jul 2025
Would you call what we did last night sex?
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22 Jul 2025
Interesting phrasing. Usually I would say vehicular manslaughter ā€œhappensā€ to the people killed!
21 Jul 2025
Lots of cringe replies about something that happened to this guy nearly four decades ago.
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beejay retweeted
once you've been to shelbyville you'll never stop wanting to beat mayor quimby to death with your bare hands
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14 Jul 2025
He looks way older than 23
Two parents listening to the heartbeat of their 23-year-old son’s transplanted heart.
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12 Jul 2025
Yeah my thesis is sort of exploring country music through a post-malonial lens
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12 Jul 2025
Forcing my way into the cockpit mid takeoff to ask the pilot and copilot if they ever hang out or if it’s mostly just an at work relationship
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11 Jul 2025
Lowkey feel like this snake oil I bought isn’t doing shiit for my impotence
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11 Jul 2025
Jordan Cahill
11 Jul 2025
Name a celebrity that would body these wigs
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handjob after 3 days no shower call that a cheese pull
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There are tens if not dozens of people worldwide who wake up every day with mental health.
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