Mum had always been very clear that she wanted a colourful Celebration of Life, not a mournful funeral, and so thatās exactly what we tried to give her.
Standing up in the chapel to deliver my eulogy on Tuesday, there was rather a lot to fit in.
First was her creativity - an artist, sculptor, poet, writer, dressmaker, musician, ballroom dancing teacherā¦it just never stopped.
Then there was her curiosity for the world. At just 21, she sailed half way around it to Australia where she lived for the next 6 years before taking another ship home via the Americas, so completing a circumnavigation of the globe. And all that in the 1960s with no WhatsApp, ChatGPT or Google Maps in sight.
She was always learning and reading - the last book she left on her bedside table (at 82 years old) was āNeuroscience for Dummiesā. That sense of wonder and openness to new things was combined with a delightful playfulness, an adamant refusal to grow up, reflected in the almost constant twinkle in her lovely green eyes.
Then there was her generosity and kindness. She constantly saw the best in people and supported us in whatever we did, so long as our hearts were in it. EVEN when my sister decided to become a sex therapist and I went off in search of the yeti.
She always told me the world was my oyster as I was growing up, which set in motion my peripatetic life. Thankfully though, I was right back at her side when she passed. And by some miracle that confounded even the doctors, she emerged from her comatose state and opened her eyes for a short while as we played her favourite songs and told her we loved her.
As I sit waiting to board my flight out of London, Iām still in a netherworld, all certainties dashed, floored by the omnipotence of āthis too shall passā, even the one person who was always there right from the very beginning.
But I do know that she would want me to carry on the adventure she began, to continue the dance. And the journey to new shores Iām embarking on now feels the perfect way to do so. As well as to start coming to terms with the biggest change, the biggest loss, that Iāve ever known.