Joined July 2008
- Tweets 20
- Following 17
- Followers 4
- Likes 5
Photos and videos
perfectputt retweeted
31 Mar 2014
Will someone please explain March Madness to me? I'm way more mad in April when my taxes are due.
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perfectputt retweeted
31 Mar 2014
We used to seek the wisdom of older people to help navigate life, now we need a 9 year old to come over everyday to help us navigate the web
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perfectputt retweeted
4 Jan 2014
The most charming thing about snow is nothing.
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perfectputt retweeted
3 Nov 2013
When you set your clocks back an hour, why does it get dark 3 hours earlier?
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perfectputt retweeted
3 Nov 2013
Walked by a shake shack with no line and didn't get anything. Where do I go to pick up healthy choice award?
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perfectputt retweeted
25 Oct 2013
@JimGaffigan When an elongated fish hits your like a big pizza pie that's a moray
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perfectputt retweeted
24 Oct 2013
I think we can all agree the turkey bacon experiment was a failure.
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perfectputt retweeted
18 Oct 2013
Adorable 9-year-old boy on my flight from LA to NY told me this joke: “How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face.” I had to laugh.
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perfectputt retweeted
10 Oct 2013
One good thing about govt shutdown: CNN has officially become the 24/7 People Yelling At Other People Yelling Channel.
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perfectputt retweeted
10 Oct 2013
I wonder if Miley ever wonders why Adele just stands there in a nice outfit and sings. And then rents a u-haul for her Grammys.
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perfectputt retweeted
5 Sep 2013
NY Fashion Week has begun! The city that never sleeps is now invaded by the women that never eat.
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