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𝔐𝔦𝔠π”₯π”žπ”’π”© @returnofthegoth

It’s Return of the Goth but you gotta sing it like Return of the Mack. I’m in my hot divorced dad era.

Joined January 2020
  • Tweets 30,051
  • Following 108
  • Followers 710
3,704 Photos and videos
In light of today’s salutes, I will be permanently deactivating my account soon. Just gotta make sure I follow y’all on other socials first
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𝔐𝔦𝔠π”₯π”žπ”’π”© retweeted
Heckin Good Dogs
@HeckinGoodDogs
15 Jan 2025
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β€œWanna self sabotage but my therapist told me not to” ass mood I guess this is growth lol
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Let’s do this
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High at work on Sudafed and Mucinex, working on a new design It’s like staring at corporate, vapid modern art trying to extract meaning and emotion
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Merry Christmas to me, I think a close friend blocked me 🫠
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I sincerely hope every Republican member of the NC legislature always has something stuck in their teeth that they can’t floss out
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I just heard a BYU choir rendition of O Holy Night that changed β€œslave” to β€œson” and I think that about sums up a lot of white US Christianity
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It should be illegal to work on rainy days. All I want to do is nap, drink a hot beverage, and cuddle lol
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Y’all ever miss the days before social media?
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𝔐𝔦𝔠π”₯π”žπ”’π”© retweeted
internet hall of fame
@InternetH0F
21 Nov 2024
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Today I changed my email signature on an internal email from β€œRegards” to β€œWith cold regards and RBF” because stupid emails at 4pm on Friday is stupid
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Balls are a useful temperature measurement for extremes Cold as balls? Extra cold Hot as balls? Extra hot But temperate as balls? wtf is wrong with you
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In a dive bar that’s playing Iron Maiden
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This morning I farted myself awake
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I am violently bored at work
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One time this past summer, a woman I was seeing showed my picture to a friend, who said I was β€œwhimsically cute” Still haven’t figured out whether it was meant as a compliment or warning πŸ˜…
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Sometimes you just need a honey bun
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Never, ever underestimate these things: 1) white supremacy 2) the callousness of white men towards everything but their net worth Yes I know I said the same thing twice
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Saying things β€œstink” instead of β€œsuck” should make a comeback, partly because using sexual terms to describe things negatively reinforces the view of sex as inherently bad, but mostly because stinking is categorically worse than sucking. In this essay I will..,
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