OSFED | #shtwt #edtwt #drugtwt | no dni | not new!! ifb | she/any prns | seventeen! | check out my strawpage!! | priv- @sickermaus

Joined October 2022
683 Photos and videos
i think i did some embarrassing shit while i was hallucinating and one of my male cousins saw i think & idk what to do about it… wtf am i supposed to say 😭 i need to quit popping stupid shit. i legitimately cant tell if what happened was real or a dream&i hate myself for that
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dont do drugs yall 😸 esp stuff that will give you early dementia but i was legitimately doing anything i could to stay clean from cutting & burning
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i weighed in today at 173lb. 900mg of benadryl
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i threw up but i was hallucinating & i stopped panicking after i got sick so 🥹 but the weirdest shit always happens whenever im high istg. a random strange man came looking for a relative of mine at like 9?pm, the person he was looking for has been deceased since 2024.. idk
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i just fully realized now that ive gotten like mild-semi severe serotonin syndrome from doing dxm earlier 😭 i cannot be playing around with that shit when i go on ssri’s im gonna freak evb out if i have to call the police cause i cant move or uncontrollably vomiting
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i had a dream i relapsed rlly bad and im deadass fighting everything to not cut or anything again im terrified
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ive been genuinely thinking about suicide a lot & i just had an extremely realistic dream where i relapsed and my family tried to help me out of it 😭 i do my hardest not to act on any of it but succumbing to being sick will probably be my fate. shit gets disheartening sometimes
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considering telling my therapist that i was & still am unwell, i don’t want to hide it cause its a really big but quiet part of my life which explains a lot of things like the way i act. its just so scary. ive had sm people laugh at my bulimia alr and it only worsens my condition
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the dogs got a joint
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i gotta start praying that the bitch who stole my phone dies or overdoses bro i cant make an indeed account to job search & itll be harder cause my current phone doesnt have an active number, i would need to do all sorts of shit w my dad to make it work. i gotta pray she khs bruh
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i be like nahh im over it its cool but this creature is so fucking aggravating im being so serious when i say that it would be better if she died, tried to stab beat steal and ruin everyones lives even if they tried hard to help her. legit just die frothing in a motel 6 somewhere
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took a gravity bong hit but it was homemade so i made it out of a liter of soda and now im fucking dying omfg

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love all yall btw thinking about rebranding to todd alquist of edtwt!! im about to smoke ive been losing my shit for days but its lowk okay cause i scraped weed together

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hello all im incredibly sad&fucked up by everything happening rn 😸 theres a good chance ill br active again cause im crushingly depressed& exhausted, i have energy for nothing not even myself most times i only get out of bed because my body forces me to. but its ok cuz im goated

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i love todd sm why is he just jumpingbwith jesse theyre so cute

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i cant smoke by myself anymore tbh i need to get somebody on the phone at the very least bcs i start to long to see people again

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counseling appt very soon like right now and im geeked idk whst im gonna say in there kms theres sm happening

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i still love pretty much everyone ive ever known or been friends with, i hope theyre all okay cause too many are unreachable now
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im actually in hell rn its so fucking hot outside & i ran out of smokes AND i have to speak to the fbi during the first week of june 😹😹😹😹 THE FEDERAL bureau of investigation like wtf did i do???? ik i said too much already but that shit sounds so scary

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i might frl start smoking cigarettes again im so over this
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the urge to take dxm in any time of stress or urgency

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