4am. Dispatched to an unresponsive male behind the wheel of a parked car. Pull up and find him in the driver seat, drooling, car on, radio blaring. 🎵🎶 Complainant steps out. Says she noticed headlights in her driveway on her way to get a glass of milk. 🥛 Go to wake him. No response. I deploy a sternum rub. He snaps awake and frantically tries to put the car in drive, smashing the gas. Luckily too drunk to pull it off. Shut the car off and yanked him out. Two tallboy White Claw Surges open, quarter full. Two more empty on the driver side floor. Asked him what he was doing in this old lady's driveway. "I lib here." His house was over an hour away. 🙃

Dispatch gave me a 911 hangup. No apartment number. Pulled into the complex and started knocking on doors. Eventually narrowed it down to one unit. Knocked and the door opened two inches before it was slammed shut. Knocked again. Door cracked open and I locked eyes with a female subject. Male voice behind her, "shut that door!" Slammed again. Not enough to force entry so I started talking through the door. "We just want to make sure everyone's okay." "We're good, it was an accident." "Just open up, takes 30 seconds, give me your name and I'm gone." Nothing. Then I realized something. She was still right there on the other side. I could hear her breathing almost. I said, "if something's going on, we can help. We can be quiet about it. Just open the door." Felt like 30 minutes of back and forth and she finally opened. Swollen bump on her forehead. Bleeding hand. Eyes that had been crying for a while. The male walked back in the room, saw us, and threw his full body weight against the door. We forced our way in. She'd been trying to call us the whole time. After beating her, he kept grabbing the phone and hanging it up.

Last night I was off duty. Back on for a night shift starting this afternoon. 🦇 It’s Friday. 💀🫣 Preparing for anything. Make sure notifications are 🔛 Anyone taking bets on what I get dispatched to?