I have a particular set of skills
Joined April 2026
- Tweets 3,297
- Following 3,133
- Followers 35,859
- Likes 9,747
468 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
Apr 24
I picked this Twitter name because I thought it would make people laugh, not because I thought it would confuse a vast subset of slack-jawed MAGA Republicans. I am NOT the actor Tom Selleck. Jesus you people are dumber than tits on a bull
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
Between Tesla and SpaceX Elon got 38,000 million dollars in government subsidies on his way to becoming the world's first trillionaire, or about $120 for every man, woman, and child in the USA. That makes Sissy SpaceX the biggest immigrant welfare queen in American history
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
Apparently not EVERYTHING Trump touches dies. The Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool has turned into a thriving industrial strength swamp. #smokefleet
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
Jun 13
Hey guys,
I'm out here buying up all the corndogs and Ivermectin so when the civil war starts, MAGA will fold like a cheap suit.
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
Jun 13
Los Angeles has 83% registered Democrats but somehow Spencer Pratt got 26% of the vote.
He totally cheated
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Hey muchachos,
If shit ever went down and the Ketamine King banned me then I will come back with a trade-in vehicle and you will know me by my Tweets
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Space Karen loves kids so much he couldn't wait to ditch his own on Christmas to rape somebody else's kids with Epstein.
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
13/06/26
SpaceX IPO made Musk a trillionaire. Old rules of capitalism no longer apply.
Robert Reich The economic principles taught in school aren’t as relevant as hype, connections & total, arbitrary control
Share your views on SpaceX’s stock market debut theguardian.com/commentisfre…
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
He couldn't wait to ditch them on Christmas to go rape somebody else's kids with Epstein
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I'll do it for free
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
Donald Trump loves you like he loves kids.
He wants to fuck you so hard your life is ruined.
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
13 Mar 2022
Tulsi Gabbard is parroting false Russian propaganda. Her treasonous lies may well cost lives.
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Tom Celica™ retweeted
Did Donald Trump start a war with Iran to cover up his relationship with Epstein?
79%
Yes
21%
No
21,078 votes • 9 hours
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Graham Platner reportedly called John Fetterman an asshole. If true, it will demonstrate that he's a little late to the party
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The key difference between Democrats and Republicans is that Democrats get threats from their enemies and Republicans get death threats from their supporters
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