here I am Thursday evening, a week ago was still in hospital with the spinal tap now coming home from another hospital visit which involved I tried injection and bonus paperwork
Since returning home, I managed to go through a significant crash and bounce (the typhoon and pressure changes didn't help) from the whole hospital and discharge and travel experience
And finding myself especially more brain fogged, zonked out and clumsy than usual -including the delightful incident occurring in my earnest attempting to putout dinner and catch up the dishes last night when i knocked a glass pitcher off the side of the counter, it didn't break! But it landed right smack on one of those giant glass bottles of soy sauce which did break, badly!
so our beautiful wooden floor was flooded with high grade soy sauce drifting under all the fridge and cabinets with glass everywhere looking like a crime scene. The towels used for cleanup were so stinky that now into the burnable trash
great cause no further injuries while cleaning up tidied up extra glass containers for making vinegar and syrups which were also stashed in that corner and located a bottle of boxed sake tucked away so that's good I guess
Also managed to knock over the trashcan strewing dozens of empty packets of medications all over the floor yet the good news is I was carrying in my adorable (sorry, he insists on cool now) and *not so little guy* in from the bath after he himself zonked out on a towel just outside the bathtub room
Changed into awesome pajamas, tuck him in under the mosquito net but then he stumbled himself back awake to say "we haven't read a book yet"
Also last night at dinner he said "when we go to Canada, we should really plan our outfits to coordinate, like not the same outfits but like a theme" or something to that effect (I would write in Japanese but it doesn't really matter, you get the gist)
Anyway, here I am staring down a basket of laundry, with a tall glass of iced water with a dash of lemon in it, the soy milk maker is running, the dishwasher is running, the washing machine is running, tomorrow is a preschool picnic yet and yet
Oh I also walked halfway to the bus stop thinking "maybe I didn't lock all the doors" I walked back, found the door I left unlocked and then came home to realize I left the whole sliding patio door which faces right out to the carport and the street and everything wide open, secured only by a mosquito screenGood for ventilation, not good for security(while I'm not concerned about robberies, my father-in-law is very diligent about such matters)
Yet here I am I'm thinking about the news about my friend from those heady salad days in the 2000s in
#Vancouver when "everything seemed possible" we pretended it was about technology but really is about community and connection and conversation and exploring what seemed to be a seachange in the way cities, networks, governments, corporations, communications, what we used to call "news", and everything could reinvent and democratize or whatever (spoiler: didn't really work out that way) leveling the playing field = ha
while I was slow on finding out about his passing (he was a PhD in environmental studies who had studied/taught at university of British Columbia then moved back to his native Mexico City) and now learned seems there's nefarious action surrounding his death :( There's an investigation, I don't want to dig too deep because right now I want to remember his magnificent smile, his frequent hugs (yes I'm a hugger living in a country where hugs don't really exist aside from very unique and sporadic experiences and they're not lingering long hugs like well anyway… I digress as usual)
I'm thinking about him and I'm thinking about all the people he touched and I'm thinking how all of us who put ourselves "out there" speaking and presenting and sharing and teaching and learning and simply showing up, documenting and sharing and so on, the things that we do in the actions that we take ripple on for decades in ways that we couldn't possibly expect
I found photos of him and me and another prolific brilliant gentleman who blogged, podcast'd, podcast'd about home recording, made creative commons music (remember friends, we are talking about mid 2000s before Twitter, when Facebook was just a thing and a few universities, RSS was everything, blogs hooray if you could roll your own, Creative Commons was the way forward, the shareable web, the read write web, smartphones weren't quite there yet but digital cameras suddenly were decent
computers had leapt into easy creative machines rather than rather expensive things for business and coding and we were freed from the constraints of maybe 5 MB of Web hosting space if you knew how to FTP things
[I realize that this is just technology sidelines to the life of a man now dead and the life of a man speaking to you from a cottage in provincial Japan still sometimes wondering how I got here and wondering how I'm still alive but here I am]
The people we met the people we hold onto the people we stay in touch with or don't but we still hold onto them when things don't disappear, artifacts and such, all that personal archaeology, all that living all that sharing
Now in this present moment, no need for chopping wood or carrying water so I make rice, fold laundry and so we go on, so we go on