Why you shouldn't write like AI
Because it's shit writing. Like absolutely bland. It's not this, it's that. Question mark? No, this is the answer. It's like eating, I don't know, sawdust. My apologies to sawdust.
It's late at night and essays that I'm reading have the exact same crappy footprint. I've learnt to live with the long hyphen. It's garish. It's out there telling you that hello, uncle, this is AI, but you know what, it might be interesting anyhow. And I've tried to give it a shot, but somewhere along the line it's like the whole paragraph has been attacked by Dementors and they took all the soul from the written words and it's left with these alphabets that juxtapose just enough to make grammatical sense.
Yes, your actual writing might be terrible. Or you don't have the patience to type endlessly into the ether, like I do, or like I love to do. I just love to write, so maybe I'm possessed with this demon that every piece of writing needs to have a soul. Maybe it's my unnecessary adulation, no, love, for prose. Too much prose, that too. Or to make that spelling mistak so you just know it's human. Hoo-man.
We are all government documents now. Devoid of colour, bereft of whatever bereft means to be bereft of. AI has perhaps made writing easier for a lot of people. And for technical stuff, it's all fine. You're expecting to be bored to the bottom of your stomach, so some outrageous terms, no matter how often they're used, ease the pain a little.
But that opinion piece which needs you to make the words be alive, it sucks when AI renders it into this communist level everyone-must-have-the-same-writing blandness. I don't think I want the extra long words - that is just showing off or winning at scrabble - but I do want a little punch in the sentence. The feeling that you said what you actually felt. The occasional slip, the authenticity. Maybe it's just me, but I don't care, this whole tweet is just me anyways.
Whatever it is, I swear, I will be nicer when it's got that hoo-man in it. Even to the nasty trolls, who I will mute with a smile because they wrote it themselves.
You have to give me one late night rant about nothing. I do spend most of the days telling governments and the RBI what to do, so I'll bloody well rant about what I want to read once in a while.