Joined September 2010
- Tweets 43,315
- Following 2,193
- Followers 4,513
- Likes 98,444
3,099 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
30 Jun 2024
found this and thought i looked cute
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Jun 7
The fact that Instagram keeps suggesting I follow a murderer currently in prison is wild to me
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May 18
while selling my dad's house in spain i was dealing with a nasty shingles infection. the estate agent was very helpful and one day was driving us to a notary. the whole car journey i was talking about having herpes and how painful it was. god bless that man for not reacting
Me: trying to buy medicine in Japan.
Cashier: What symptoms do you have?
Me: Coughing.
Cashier: Dry cough or wet cough.
Me: .....competitive cough.
Cashier pauses.
Me: I mean aggressive.
Cashier now visibly fighting for her life professionally.
she pulls out translator app.
Translator: His cough seeks victory.
Cashier: "..."
Friend in another aisle collapsing silently.
Cashier finally hands me medicine very carefully like she's handling a dangerous animal.
then she bows and says: Please defeat your cough.
I almost cried laughing in the store.
What’s the worst thing you've ever said accidentally while traveling?
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May 7
wonder have netflix considered a floating subtitle overlay that draws over apps while you're watching and scrolling at the same time. sounds like a fun project
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femininamadán retweeted
May 6
You don’t hate Dan Schneider enough.
May 6
Amanda Bynes debuts shocking eyebrow makeover on rare PDA outing with boyfriend trib.al/kD5XMJL
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Apr 7
remember when we used all have that "i think i like this little life" song snippet stuck in our heads? can we even go back to that please?
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femininamadán retweeted
Mar 19
Those football jerseys Bohemians collabbed on with Fontaines DC are supporting Palestine. 30% from each sale goes directly to Medical Aid for Palestinians. The amount of fakes I see on vinted is actually unreal. Do you feel no shame at all? Have some integrity.
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Mar 13
kinda wild that instagram is suggesting i follow a local murderer but here we are
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Mar 4
get wrecked losers
Ai-generated artwork officially is ineligible for copyright protection as the US Supreme Court declined to review a appeal case.
The court rules that artwork needs to have a human creator in order to be eligible.
(Source: reuters.com/legal/government…)
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Mar 3
“Caleb Shomo looks gay haha” name 5 women who feel safe around you.
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femininamadán retweeted
Mar 3
Stop using my music, perverts @WhiteHouse
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femininamadán retweeted
Feb 19
What's next from Keke Palmer? MORE HORROR.
“I would love to do MORE horror,” Palmer states. “Like a full-on franchise. I would love to be like Jamie Lee Curtis. So if I could do a Halloween type situation, I would have so much fun with that.”
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femininamadán retweeted
Feb 18
I feel like it doesn’t bother ya’ll enough that Conor McGregor was found civilly liable for being a rapist.
Feb 18
🚨 BREAKING: Conor McGregor revealed in a now-deleted tweet that he's been offered an opponent and date for his UFC return and has accepted the offer 👀
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Feb 18
why is google weather so bad lately? it's been telling me it's snowing in dublin so many times the last two weeks with zero snow or even logical conditions for snow
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Jan 26
kinda mad the first person i intentionally sang in front of in my life was a music director for a choir at an audition two weeks ago and today i booked flights to brussels to sing at a competition with said choir. kinda mad
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