Come with me if you want to leave
Joined March 2009
- Tweets 70,597
- Following 678
- Followers 22,582
- Likes 187,381
22,689 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
23 Jun 2025
“Still an issue.” Like you’re describing a leaky shower head or a slightly loud fridge. Sublime
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What exactly are ripe & ready avocados ripe & ready for? War? Love? Dancing? Because it’s definitely not eating I can tell you that much
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Had some truly excellent pan con tomate with anchovies & a caprese salad for lunch
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Jun 13
Just saw someone light a fag with a stove lighter in the beer garden. Stunning
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Jun 13
In my defence I’m ill & Mr Gwd had to actually wake me up or I’d still be outers
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Jun 12
Incredible bulb on Come Dine with Me rn. Just a complete gimp, unbearable
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Jun 12
Just heard a loud & aggrieved “WANKER” outside just now, which has really put a pep in my step tbqhwy
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Jun 12
Still angered by ratbag Paul Breach’s new song’s line “scores a goal of which we know.” What does that even mean. Gulag
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Jun 12
I’m an avid sitter, twisted fire sitter
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Gwdihŵ 🦉 retweeted
The trailer park fight between the Taliban and the IRA will forever be the high water mark of American entertainment.
I shall always love the Deadliest Warrior show for the gem of an episode the Taliban vs Ira was
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Jun 11
Thought they’d photoshopped his hair on to the planet for a moment there
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Jun 11
Coming to realise that I’m more or less the Jackson Pollock of applying fake tan
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Jun 10
Never thought I’d be nostalgic for the halcyon days of “pussy in bio” but here we are
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