damn it feels good to be a gangster.
Joined July 2017
- Tweets 60,748
- Following 6,977
- Followers 43,908
- Likes 240,892
911 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
4 Oct 2021
Pre-order my new book, “Brian of DC Roofing and Waterproofing in Rocklin, CA Sent Me Dick Pics & Related Tales of the Audacity of Men” on Amazon soon.
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Jun 12
My attraction to Hunter Biden made me worry that I’m attracted to men who use cocaine but I’ve since realized I’m attracted to men with confidence, and unfortunately coke gives them that.
my attraction to gavin newsom, hunter biden, etc is a purely pavlovian response. i am conditioned to salivate for that exact type of evil in anticipation of a treat
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Just scrolled through 2000 likes hoping Hunter Biden was one of them and Hunter Biden was not one of them.
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 11
I just finished East of Eden this morning. I'm not religious at all but Steinbeck looked me in the eye and said: you are not destined to be your worst self; you are not condemned by your past; you get to choose, every single day, you get to choose. This book doesn't need you to believe in God (I judged it too harshly and quickly). It only needs you to believe in people...the terrifying, beautiful fact that we are capable of both darkness and light, and that the choice between them is always, stubbornly, ours. Honestly, one of the most devastating things I've ever read.
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Jun 12
So tired of texting that I’m about to act like Claude and start telling people they’re out of free messages once I reach a certain point of the day.
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 11
Do you ever just see your pet chilling peacefully and think "I need to invade this perfect angels' personal space immediately
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Jun 12
RT @devilbears: if i was a deer i’d also fuck around in the middle of the road who cares
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 11
Watching NYC in the Mamdani era is like seeing another classroom get a pizza party every single week .
When James Dolan cancels the watch party outside MSG, we bring the watch party to you.
Thanks to the @NBA, Knicks Game 4 is now playing on dozens of @LinkNYC screens across our city.
LGK.
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 11
Donald Slump
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
BREAKING: In a stunning moment, Donald Trump's former economic advisor just admitted on Fox News that inflation is being driven nearly exclusively by bad decisions that Donald Trump has made. Wow.
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 10
The same people who said masks were "literally 1984" think this is fine.
Jun 10
🚨 BREAKING: Palantir has received a contract from the Trump Administration to accumulate and centralize data on Americans.
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 10
TRUMP: “I’m not concerned about the latest inflation numbers that came out this morning. I love it. I love the inflation.”
At this point I’m convinced Trump is intentionally trying to destroy the United States.
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Jun 10
“You can now chat with Asana AI in Slack!”
okay well I’d rather die but thanks.
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 9
He’s actually trying to claim he didn’t get booed. What a total loser LMAOOO
Trump on being booed at the NBA Finals: I think it was mostly cheers. It was loud. And it was very enthusiastic
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Crowd at Bryant Park watch party also booed President Trump.
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
Jun 9
The boos did not come through like this on the TV broadcast, this is BRUTAL
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Jun 10
One of my favorite memories of temporarily living near DC was going here at night — it felt so grand, so quiet, so sacred, so powerful.
Absolutely vulgar to use it for this bullshit.
Workers prep the Lincoln Memorial to host the weigh-in for Trump's UFC event at the White House (📸: @JoeHeim)
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
When you try to storm off but can barely stand up
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AlwaysAshley retweeted
You’re literally running cover for Jeffrey Epstein. STFU.
You mess with our kids, and you WILL be caught!
Thank you to our partners in Ohio that helped facilitate Operation Playground Therapy. Together, we investigated health care companies in Ohio who offered community-based programs for Medicaid-enrolled children across the Southern District of Ohio.
These companies allegedly passed children's Medicaid information to billing entities that submitted FRAUDULENT claims for behavioral health and mental health services that were NEVER provided. Total fraud of over $75M STOLEN from our children.
THEY HAVE BEEN FOUND AND WILL FACE JUSTICE!
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