@BenCordes profile picture
Ben Cordes @BenCordes

Jokes and jokes and spaghetti.

Joined January 2009
  • Tweets 224
  • Following 40
  • Followers 1,704
6 Photos and videos
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
15 Jan 2023
Finished @tunicgame this weekend. Most isometric fun since Link's Awakening, and most challenging puzzles since Grim Fandango. Thanks devs – loved every minute! 🗡️🧩
1
372
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
7 Jan 2021
House rep support energy: Morpheus’s pre-rave speech to Zion. House rep objection energy: little Timmy reading his book report on Go Dog Go to the whole class.
1
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
15 Sep 2020
It took 30 years, but I’ve finally fortified my home with security measures that would make Kevin McCallister proud. How would you respond if your B&E triggered the most bombastic and colorful rave on the block? 🕺🏻 #SmartHomeVibes
1
1
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
10 May 2020
🎼 Oompa Loompa doopety doo. We’re going to take your children from you. ☺️
1
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
13 Mar 2020
Has anyone tried hitting @realDonaldTrump with a confounding curse? All you need is 2 words: “be specific”.
1
Ben Cordes retweeted
Ricky Gervais
 @rickygervais
31 May 2018
When did it become more fashionable to undermine and discredit someone who disagrees with you than to offer a reasoned and winning counter argument?
1,680
3,902
20,674
Ben Cordes retweeted
Tomiwa @Tomiwa
6 May 2018
Infinity War spoilers, but with no context... #ThisIsAmerica
34
1,551
3,274
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
20 Mar 2018
My bottle of #TheLastDab Burnin’ Butthole Edition came in today. Thanks, @Heatonist!
4
Ben Cordes retweeted
Neal Brennan
 @nealbrennan
9 Mar 2018
I'm buying tickets for underprivileged kids to see "Phantom Thread" so they can understand narcissism and the codependency it fosters in relationships.
45
619
6,400
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
1 Feb 2018
Give it up, Papyrus. Go sit with Comic Sans.
1
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
1 Feb 2018
Dance so hard your iPhone asks you if you’re driving.
2
Ben Cordes retweeted
George Takei
 @GeorgeTakei
26 Jul 2017
History shall record that you are not only the stupidest, most incompetent president ever, but also the cruelest and pettiest. #Shame
1,739
14,372
32,761
just watched the Defiant Ones and more like Jimmy ioPhone am I right? (I am not right)
1
1
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
25 Jul 2017
.@elonmusk I'm no rocket scientist but I am positive that the fastest production car in the world is really @TomCruise.
1
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
20 Apr 2017
When you reach to grab the J from your mouth 👌🏻. But you remember you're out in public ✌🏻.
Ben Cordes retweeted
Carter Wilkerson @carterjwm
6 Apr 2017
HELP ME PLEASE. A MAN NEEDS HIS NUGGS
32,549
2,903,125
1,121,613
Ben Cordes retweeted
Tom @tdawks
1 Sep 2015
What the fuck is Eye Toast?!
88
2,563
5,302
found another great pic of me and @BenCordes
2
1
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
26 Jun 2015
Let me know when they finally decide to legalize gay marijuana.
4
Ben Cordes @BenCordes
20 Mar 2015
Can't tell if you're stoned? Ask yourself, "what was I just doing?" If you can't remember, congrats! Your dad couldn't be more disappointed.
2
Load more