A Shapely Pillar of Enchanted Meat

Joined June 2013
498 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
Ok, I’m married now!
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Gail Williams retweeted
All right social media, my new song "Mr. Axolotl's Teatime" is live over on Bandcamp RIGHT NOW. Check it out and let me know what you love most about it today! #music #selfpromotion orangemushrooms.bandcamp.com…
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Gail Williams retweeted
Botanically speaking, cucumbers and tomatoes are, in fact, fruit. Sorry about that.
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I get dressed in darkness… I get dressed in darkness Baklava
Your gangster name is the colour of your underwear and the last food that you ate
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The only thing hotter than your man fixing the cheese drawer is your man helping you wear out the cheese drawer to the point of failure. #cheesedrawersareforlovers
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If you didn’t buy your girl nothing for National Gumdrop Day , be a man & let her fuck somebody else
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Empty plastic bags. My brain is officially liquefied by the moving process.
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From? From. (From!)
“Buy a 7-foot diameter beanbag!” They said. “It will make your life so whimsical!” They said.
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It’s me. I’m “They”.
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Owning chattel is self-harm.
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Some of you are still looking for New Year’s resolutions…
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Stop trying to sell me chili powder disguised as chile powder. Also just generally fuck off with your chili powder, ok?
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Awesome live music at @ArmisticeBeer Sundays 2-5pm. Rob Dietrich is amazing!
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Ok, i’m engaged now!
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😻 😻 😻 @inscrutabletaco
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Lady Riley Spanakopita of Capitalism is a Disease
Lady ShitFace Toast of Amazon.
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Lady Riley, Long Overdue Mushroom Tarragon Soup of BevMo
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Lady Riley, a Buncha Stuff of a Buncha Stuff (this thread to be retired, new cataloguing thread incoming)
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Hot new selfie just dropped!
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