you go back hungry as fuck and ask for brisket, a rib, AND a smoked sausage link. then mac and cheese and collard greens for your fixins. y'all build 100 foot tall Gundams and shit, don't let a BBQ tray make you look like a punk bitch!
USA. I went to a Texas BBQ restaurant.
The man at the counter asked: brisket or ribs?
I stood very still.
In my country, this question has another name.
It is called choosing a clan.
Brisket: slow. Patient. It has waited 14 hours for this moment.
Fourteen hours of smoke and silence.
This is the way of discipline. This is the way of my teachers.
Ribs: bold. Immediate. They arrive already holding their weapon.
They do not wait. They do not explain themselves.
This is the way of instinct. This is the way of warriors who do not return.
I asked the man which was better.
He said: "Depends on the person."
I stared at him for a long time.
This was not an answer.
This was a test.
Perhaps the most important test of my life.
I chose brisket. I sat down. I prepared myself.
The ribs arrived at the next table.
They smelled of smoke and oak and something I cannot name in any language.
The man eating them did not look at his food.
He looked at nothing.
He had already transcended.
I went back to the counter.
"I made an error," I said. "Ribs."
I sat down again.
The brisket at the next table glistened quietly.
Fourteen hours of patience. Fourteen hours of waiting.
Looking at me.
Not with anger. With something worse.
With understanding.
I went back.
"Brisket," I said. "I have returned."
The man at the counter said nothing.
He had seen this before.
Brisket. Ribs. Brisket. Ribs.
On my fourth approach, he placed both on the counter without speaking.
I understood then: there is no choosing.
There is only the truth of what you already are.
And what I am, apparently, is someone who cannot leave a BBQ restaurant.
I ate. I could not finish.
I sat with the remains for a very long time.
The other customers left. New customers arrived. I was still there.
The man came to my table at closing time.
"You doing okay?"
I told him I was conducting a funeral.
He nodded like this was a reasonable thing to say.
A ninja does not choose between brisket and ribs.
A ninja orders both and sits with the consequences until the restaurant closes.
Is this normal in Texas?
And which one was right?
I need to know. I am going back tomorrow.