Playwright, Chicago Parent arts columnist, blogger for that thing you might've read. Wife to 1, Mom to 3 & best hyperbolist this side of the moon.
Joined May 2009
- Tweets 6,713
- Following 1,428
- Followers 1,645
- Likes 4,333
323 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
8 Mar 2018
Me: I’m so tired I want to die.
4 yr-old: Mom, do Daisy Duck.
Me: *Daisy Duck impression from underneath a pillow*
4 yr-old (laughs hysterically): That’s the best in the world!
Me: I could probably raise 3 or 4 more children.
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20 May 2023
If a storyline involving @sam_buttrey isn’t in the cards for #OMITB - as a @SteveMartinToGo relative, perhaps?- then I truly don’t understand what the people want. (You will be SO missed, Sam! #jeopardymasters)
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8 Nov 2021
Dear good people of @NintendoAmerica (and @ZeldaUniverse peeps and anyone else who loves #Zelda and #BOTW)... My 7 year-old has some gentle suggestions in advance of #botw2.
He says anyone in charge can have these for free.
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8 Nov 2021
This was a delightful thread. I really- nerdily- got excited towards the end of the list. WHO'S GONNA WIN?!
6 Nov 2021
The House of Faberge made 52 "Imperial" eggs as Easter gifts for Tsars Alexander III and Nicholas II to give to their wives and moms. 46 of these survive. I will rank all 46 Imperial Faberge eggs.
Keely Flynn retweeted
9 Sep 2020
In 1939 Adolf Hitler was nominated for the #NobelPeacePrize.
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7 May 2020
This whole thread= awful and scary.
6 May 2020
Husband was pulled over by the police on his way home from work. Around 2/2:30 am. They told him to get out of the car from the speaker thing they have. He refused. They walked up on either sides of the car. Flashlight in his face. Neither cop had a mask on. They again...
5 May 2020
Whuuuut.
3 May 2020
We used Covid-19 shutdown to do projects that would’ve been inconvenient for residents regularly (street paving, park renovations etc). One project was ripping up the 1960s vinyl floor at city hall. We thought we’d find garbage but instead we found the original from 100 yrs ago
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29 Apr 2020
Oh my goodness, I love CPS and their wonderful students...
29 Apr 2020
Our students have faced a lot of adversity this school year.
We wanted to give them the chance to share their thoughts and experiences with our entire CPS family.
25 Apr 2020
With all of the great @oldtownschool classes make the switch to online instruction, you didn’t think they’d leave their beloved Wiggleworms behind, did you? #Chicago tinies (and #parents), get your wiggle on! (New session May 4th!) bit.ly/2y1rNLo
Keely Flynn retweeted
17 Apr 2020
Have we considered consulting Dr. Dre about coronavirus, seeing as we have apparently gone through all other available doctors
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Keely Flynn retweeted
14 Apr 2020
Wife: Use the newspaper to get that spider down
Me *reads the news out loud*
Spider *depressed* holy shit
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Keely Flynn retweeted
13 Apr 2020
.@kaitlancollins to Trump: "You said when someone is President of the United States, their authority is total. That‘s not true. Who told you that?"
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2 Apr 2020
Suzy (8), staring out the window: ...
Me: Let’s finish up your work and then you can go out back and see what’s what!
Suzy (wistfully): It would be easier if “what’s what” didn’t make so many exciting noises...
#quarantinelife
19 Mar 2020
You are a treasure, @elclimo. And you are about to make me a goshdarn household hero. ❤️
17 Mar 2020
You guys.
17 Mar 2020
It's a #StPatricksDay penguin party! 💚🐧 While we can't go out & party, the animals can! Our caretakers are committed to providing enriching activities (like edible shamrocks) for the animals with or without guests here to see it. Check in throughout the day to see more!
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16 Mar 2020
YASSS!
16 Mar 2020
I guess we’re doing this!! I’m in. Are you?
Keely Flynn retweeted
14 Mar 2020
“This will pass... we’ve learned a lot.” The President keeps talking like he’s in the last scene of Jurassic Park, when really we’re in the part of the movie where the dinosaurs discover the fences are no longer electrified.
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27 Feb 2020
“...He doesn’t wear pants!”
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Keely Flynn retweeted
22 Feb 2020
Weird how many people who were dead wrong about “electability” in 2016 are still experts on it today!
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