Software developer and dev relations @Desmos. Former curriculum author @Mathalicious and high school math teacher.
Joined June 2011
- Tweets 12,616
- Following 134
- Followers 1,651
- Likes 1,648
687 Photos and videos
25 Jun 2019
I’ve had a few people take me up on my offer to communicate with me via paper and postal workers.
DM me if you want to get in on the action.
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22 Jun 2019
Roads in Los Angeles don’t have speed limits so much as they have speed aspirations.
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15 Jun 2019
The most impressive thing about Frank Thomas’s career is that he is—somehow—the best actor in every single one of those Nugenix commercials.
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12 Jun 2019
I’m going to get off this website soon, with no particular plan to come back.
DMs are open. If you want to correspond via the U.S. Postal Service, message me and we can make that happen.
Otherwise I’ll hit you with the goosebumps walkaway in a couple weeks.
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Chris Lusto retweeted
16 Jan 2018
I have rarely experienced a failure of the imagination so complete as standing on Omaha Beach, looking in.
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5 Jun 2019
The only blemish on the entire series is that Ron Swanson would definitely know that Corinthian leather isn't a real thing.
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4 Jun 2019
“Let’s not have a conversation that none of us knows the point of.”
— @shapeoperator, as always, proving that he’s good at being in charge of stuff
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2 Jun 2019
Curious whether @SarahTaber_bww has developed a take on /Anna Karenina/. Because I came for the love story, but I’m pretty into Levin’s farm.
30 May 2019
“[M]ost of the time this happens, it will probably be a user error that produces a confusing plot, slowly.”
— @shapeoperator diagnosing the worst kind of error
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11 May 2019
I mean, the “preaching” is a pretty important distinction here, yeah?
Traditional sexual morality isn’t about women deciding to fuck less. It’s about men telling women to fuck less.
So the less fucking part doesn’t take us a very long way toward this exciting rediscovery.
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10 May 2019
9 May 2019
the Uber IPO is basically a bet that they can figure out driverless cars before drivers figure out depreciation
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8 May 2019
However, Bunny Money™ is redeemable at the bar, our gift shop, and our sister club in Fort Myers, Florida.
wired.com/story/hack-binance…
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8 May 2019
I realize my last couple tweets have been me complaining about people using parking lots incorrectly.
I’ll get us back to regularly scheduled programming now.
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8 May 2019
Purchasing gasoline entitles you to locate your car at a pump:
A. for the duration of your consumer experience on the premises.
B. until you have finished using the pump.
34%
A
66%
B
98 votes • Final results
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5 May 2019
TIL that Jägermeister is the official booze of the NHL, and I cannot imagine a more perfect combination of unpalatable things.
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5 May 2019
This was obviously a joke, but it's honestly brilliant.
Hockey can only be tolerated if you're too drunk to notice it. And Jäger can only be tolerated if it's too cold to taste it.