used to work in sports. now i just tweet about them. ᵕ̈
Joined March 2010
- Tweets 11,624
- Following 5,924
- Followers 11,778
- Likes 16,854
2,628 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
8 Sep 2023
What kind of interview process do the marlins have for their ball boys
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Now that he has his World Cup already, a free Messi just out here having fun is a truly scary thought for the rest of the world.
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The fact that Boston got to experience the tartan army AND Norway fans is just everything
De las mejores porras que veremos en este Mundial. Noruega simulando un barco vikingo.
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Jun 14
The fact that the bagpipes are blaring during this whole game is *chef’s kiss*
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May 11
Feels like a challenge
Protein shakes? 3.4 oz or less, but rotisserie chickens??? As many as you can fit in your carry-on.
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May 2
Sure sex is cool and all, but have you ever help onto a single sock because you hope the other one will pop up at some point but never does and then month(s) later you find said lost sock and are able to finally put the pair away?
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Apr 6
You always hear about the girl whose favorite thing to listen to are true crime podcasts and murder documentaries. But i don’t think we talk enough about the girl who can watch Dr Pimple Popper while they eat
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Mar 23
There’s almost too much to unpack here
A professional cornhole player who happens to be a quadruple amputee is facing murder charges over the shooting death of a man in Maryland.
Details: tmz.me/HlFnrjU
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Mar 16
I was in Whole Foods today and a toddler was double fisting some apples. He only stopped eating to grab some tin fish off of a shelf while his mom was waiting in line and put it in the cart without her knowing
Mar 15
I have no idea who this woman in. She was in a line at Whole Foods and I was struck by her appearance. I felt compelled to compliment her and she seemed happy that she was noticed. (Seriously, how could anyone not?) I asked for permission to take her picture and she shared with me that she turns 83 tomorrow.
Thank you for making this gray, rainy, cold day, a lot brighter my unknown friend. 💙
Original story:Kevin Kendrick
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Mar 12
If you love seasons, the mid Atlantic region is for you. You could experience all 4 seasons in one week. Within the last 48 hours we’ve had summer, spring and winter!
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Feb 25
Even having to walk my dog through blizzards and in below zero degree temperatures could not make me a cat person.
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Feb 22
Imagine having your heart ripped out after losing on a global stage and they hand you a stuffed animal
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Feb 22
Connor Hellebuyck deserves like 4 gold medals for that game tbh
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Feb 17
Who says baseball is boring
Feb 17
MLBPA executive director Tony Clark resigned after an internal investigation revealed he had an inappropriate relationship with his sister-in-law, who had been hired by the union in 2023, sources tell me and @DVNJr.
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Feb 10
There are a number of reasons why I’d be terrible at curling but I just know my intrusive thoughts would overtake and I would be blasting those stones through the button
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