In the summer of 1995 I was given a choice that I didn't know was life or death.
I was a data systems analyst with the 33rd Fighter Wing out of Eglin Air Force Base, Florida. F-15Es. I tracked every break on every jet after the day's sorties, built the readiness reports, forecasted the trends from a little office right on the flight line. JP-8 in the morning air. Great people. I loved it.
In my off hours I served on the base Honor Guard. We carried the caskets of fallen service members, fired the 21-gun salute, and folded the flag into a tight triangle to hand to a mother, a widow, a child. I have looked a lot of grieving families in the eye. I did not yet understand how close I would come to being the reason someone folded a flag for me.
Late that summer I learned our unit was rotating to Saudi Arabia for Operation Southern Watch. They gave me a choice: deploy in January, or wait and go with the next rotation later in the year.
My boyfriend at the time—my husband now—told me to just get it over with and go in January, when the desert "only" hits 105 instead of 120. So I said yes.
The week before I shipped out, a quiet young Airman moved into the dorm room across the hall. A crew chief in my unit. We'd nod and say hey passing in the hallway but I never got the chance to really know him because we deployed the next week.
I did my 93 days in Dhahran, lived in Khobar Towers with hundreds of other Americans, came home that spring on a 24-hour C-130 ride, got engaged, went back to the beach and the good Florida weather and ordinary life.
My quiet neighbor deployed with the next rotation. The one I'd chosen not to be on.
Two weeks before that rotation was set to come home, terrorists bombed Khobar Towers. Nineteen American Airmen were killed. Twelve of them were ours, from the 33rd. One of them was the quiet crew chief from across the hall—Airman 1st Class Peter J. Morgera, 19 years old, from Stratham, New Hampshire.
Over the years I've wondered why my husband told me to go early. Why I came home and they didn't.
There is no tidy answer. What I have is a responsibility—to make sure they are not just a number. So today, say their names with me.
Eglin lost:
MSgt Kendall K. Kitson, Jr. — Yukon, OK
TSgt Daniel B. Cafourek — Watertown, SD
TSgt Patrick P. Fennig — Greendale, WI
TSgt Thanh Van Nguyen — Panama City, FL
SrA Earl F. Cartrette, Jr. — Sellersburg, IN
SrA Jeremy A. Taylor — Rose Hill, KS
Sgt Millard D. Campbell — Angleton, TX
A1C Brent E. Marthaler — Cambridge, MN
A1C Brian W. McVeigh — DeBary, FL
A1C Peter J. Morgera — Stratham, NH
A1C Joseph E. Rimkus — Edwardsville, IL
A1C Joshua E. Woody — Corpus Christi, TX
Memorial Day isn't about the ones who came home. It's about them. I get to be grateful only because they paid for it.
Say their names today. 🇺🇸