In 2016 (age 30), I started a company with $25k. It was a half measure, I was running from something. By accident, it became a multimillion dollar business. I sold it after 10 years (age 40) - my last day is Dec. 31st.
My reflections on 10 years of prioritizing money over people.
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I always wanted a Cadillac Escalade, Floor Seats to NBA Games, Sideline Passes to NFL Games and Penthouse Suites at Vegas Casinos. I thought that would be peak happiness. I got all of that within a year. It didn’t fulfill me.
I’d make $10,000 in a day and not be happy. I’d make $200,000 in a month and be upset I didn’t make $250,000. My entire self worth became tied to numbers on a spreadsheet.
I have a phone full of celebrities, star athletes, political leaders and business titans - but no one who checks in to see how I’m doing. I had amazing Employees, but those connections are qualified - they’ll always defer to the person signing the paycheck.
I became everyone’s safety net - I could solve everyone else’s problems but never my own. I hid my trauma behind the veneer of success and I muted my pain with drugs and gambling. I never found the courage to ask for help.
“I’ll take care of myself tomorrow” became “next week”, then “next month” and eventually 10 years. I was broken at the start and I’m broken at the end. I never committed to healing. Popping pills was easier than confronting feelings.
Isolation and prolonged loneliness are unique pains. You can find yourself in a crowded room and feel completely alone. Money can’t replace human connection. Success can’t replace love. When you have lots of zeros on your bank account but no one to share it with - it all starts to feel meaningless.
Don’t make the same mistakes I did. Make the intentional choice to heal. Prioritize people. Build meaningful relationships. Love someone. Risk heartbreak. Short term pain is better than feeling nothing at all. If you let fear guide your life - eventually the nightmares will become your reality.
I’d give away every dollar right now just to have someone to look at Christmas lights with.