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South Western Delays @SW_Trauma

Bringing you the best of the London commute. This is a parody account.

Joined December 2015
  • Tweets 376
  • Following 100
  • Followers 1,891
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It’s not always clear that this is a parody account but @SW_Help it’s very clear that you run a parody rail service. It’s absolute carnage this morning. How did you run a good service before reduced passenger numbers? I remember now, you didn’t.
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This just to let you know that I’ll be making my way into London tomorrow so you now have 12 hours of advance notice to create all sorts of calamity on the rail network.
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I should have put money on this. Absolute carnage at Basingstoke station.
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Our business process that we use to take your money is the one we are most proud of. But we can’t even get that right today - all the ticketing machines at Basingstoke are down.
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What a joke we are - there is no longer a mass commute into London but we still insist on having peak ticket prices!
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I’m proud to report that even although we are running reduced services, the remaining ones are still late. That’s us. Late. Consistently.
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Passenger numbers are reduced, but trains are still running late. Check if your train was late and by how many minutes at raildelay.co.uk
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In a few hours time I’ll be attempting the first SWR train in 18 months into London. I expect it will be a breeze with all that down time being used to improve the service.
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Ditto!
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I must apologise to my followers. Since the onset of the pandemic I’ve not been commuting. Would me complaining about the conditions at home keep you entertained?
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South Western Delays retweeted
Günter Richter 🚀@gunterrichter
15 May 2020
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South Western Delays retweeted
Denise Welch
@RealDeniseWelch
21 Mar 2020
No words 👏👏👏👏👏👏❤️❤️❤️
NHS Million@NHSMillion
20 Mar 2020
The spirit of NHS staff is absolutely astonishing ❤️ Please RT if you’re proud. WE WILL BEAT THIS!
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I can't stop watching this!
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As often as we clean our trains.
SWR Watch@swtrains_watch
11 Mar 2020
Hi @SW_Help How often are the screens and keypads on your ticket machines cleaned please? Will the current regime be stepped up given concerns around #COVID19 ?
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An imaginary one. We never have free seats.
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We hope that you are enjoying the small price increase which now allows you to spend between 50 and 100% more time on each journey!
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.@SirPeterHendy Do you think the level of service provided South Western Railways @SW_Help is acceptable? Can you tell us why you block unhappy rail customers?
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South Western Delays retweeted
The Running Witch@CazzaCo
9 Oct 2019
Praise where praise is due @SW_Help Very comfortable journey from Clapham Jct to Woking (end destination Bristol) - big comfy seats, very clean train & friendly & helpful guard 👍🏻 @swtrains_watch
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We’re working on our 2020 strategy and have determined that we’re not even qualified to run a bath.
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