If you are debating whether to get your kids the chicken pox vaccine, I would like to tell you a story. When I was 5 I got chicken pox. No big deal. I was sick for a couple of days and then went on with my life. But what I didn’t know as a 5 year old kid was I had been entered into the world’s shittiest lottery. 30 years later, my number came up. If you don’t know about shingles, it is a condition that causes a horrible blistery rash and fiery, stabbing nerve pain. Most people get theirs on their torso. If you are unlucky you might get it on your face. If you are EXTREMELY unlucky like I am, you can get it on your genitals. So there I was (on my goddamn birthday) at the first of two consecutive ER visits, crying in pain when I was diagnosed with shingles. I was given antiviral medication and each day a shot of fentanyl. That’s right, fentanyl. The pain was so egregious they gave me the same pain reliever they gave my stepfather after OPEN HEART Surgery! I CANNOT overstate the excruciating agony I was in. I was given a prescription for Vicodin. I spent the next 7 days curled into a fetal ball on my mother’s couch. I did not eat and I barely drank because otherwise I would have to use the bathroom. Let’s say, that was something I would do anything to avoid. 7 days of absolute, unrelenting misery. I am telling you this story because if you can spare your children from being entered into the shingles lottery, you really should. The chicken pox vaccine prevents more than just chicken pox. Chicken pox is not a problem. Shingles most definitely is.