Hello this is my bio I hope you enjoyed reading it ok bye
Joined December 2014
- Tweets 6,675
- Following 588
- Followers 3,542
- Likes 3,176
511 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
24 Nov 2020
Random bits in films I'll never forget:
1) "Diplomatic Immunity!"
*gets shot in the head*
"It's just been revoked"
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25 Dec 2025
The thing that bugs me about Christmas themed porn is how due to scheduling commitments most of it is filmed in Summer
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14 Jul 2024
The fucking FLOOD of influencers rushing to make a 'pov: trump during the assassination' vids 😂
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Adam Staunton blue tick retweeted
6 Jul 2024
*to a sobbing woman* is there a mr. carriage
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4 Jul 2024
Just took my dead Nan to vote, forgot to bring her I.D tho so she was turned away 😓 "as dead as Thatcher!" I shouted, pounding her urn onto the ballot table, no one cheered 😓
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Adam Staunton blue tick retweeted
4 Jul 2024
When people give fake answers at comedy nights
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26 Jun 2024
Fish girlfriends be like "babe if I was a worm would you eat me?"
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18 Jun 2024
I think Hunter Biden looking good for his age is proof that crack don't crack
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16 Jun 2024
Leaving implications aside 'Princess of lesser mortals' sounds like a cool character in GOT
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16 Jun 2024
Guys is it sexist to say "nice ass, bitch" to a bitch that has a nice ass?
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15 Jun 2024
Christ hasn't the cow suffered enough?
15 Jun 2024
Cleverly demands probe after police car hits cow bbc.in/4ckT7lA
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15 Jun 2024
As a self diagnosed adhder sometimes I block/unfollow people cos I get it into my head that they don't like me, then they realise I've unfollowed them and don't like me anyway ☺️
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14 Jun 2024
Oh to be an unlicensed vape seller outside Anfield right now
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14 Jun 2024
Made me spit out my water reading but tbf that might be the e coli too
BREAKING: Sandwich maker Greencore recalls products due to potential presence of E.coli, Asda says.
Read more 🔗 news.sky.com/story/sandwich-…
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14 Jun 2024
I once had a spicy pepper and I cried but I was almost happy I cried because the extra moisture was nice I kept trying to cry onto my tongue
12 Jun 2024
I had lunch with a white friend where I put sriracha on my rice & he wanted to try it bc he never tried sriracha before
After 1 bite, his face turned bright red, he started sweating & ran off to chug milk bc it was too spicy for him
Most white people can’t handle spicy
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13 Jun 2024
Anyone done it on birds photos were they've got their tits out yet? Seems the next logical step
13 Jun 2024
Big fan of people typing "liked" under tweets signifying they liked the tweet, funniest outcome of this update
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10 Jun 2024
Butts was the perfect thing to choose for I like big butts, 'I like big tits and I cannot lie' just seems crass
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