Your one-stop shop for all things California Golden Bears, moderated and fact-checked by real Calgorithm patriots. Allegedly a parody account.
Joined December 2024
- Tweets 793
- Following 113
- Followers 957
- Likes 119
256 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
Jan 30
JUST IN: Cal HC Tosh Lupoi has reportedly slain the mythical serpent Jörmungandr off the coast of Norway
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Jun 5
EA Sports has confirmed that in College Football 27, players attending Stanford in Road To Glory have a 1 in 15 chance of becoming abducted as part of the Stanford Prison Experiment.
Head Designer Mike Litoris described the cutscene as part of EA's efforts to add more realism.
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Jun 3
NEW: FC Bayern midfielder Leon Goretzka, one of the biggest names in free agency this summer, has reportedly turned down an offer from Oakland Roots SC, saying he wasn’t comfortable living in the East Bay on account of the Berkeley Booty Snatcher.
[@FabrizioRomano]
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May 29
Xavier Becerra, candidate for California Governor, has just received the max contribution of $39,200 from the Stanford Tree to his campaign
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May 29
Fake news. There was no Big Game played in 2020
The last 10 games between Cal and Stanford!
A very underrated rivalry!
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May 27
I cannot believe this isn’t Centel
Daniel Lurie may be known for his lighthearted Instagram reels, but a new casting call seeks to place a likeness of the San Francisco mayor in a not-so-family-friendly scenario.
“Daniel Lurie impersonator needed for: gay adult film,” posters spotted in the Castro and Haight Ashbury last week read.
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May 25
Stanford QB Davis Warren has been taken by the Dark Watchers just north of Big Sur and is out for the foreseeable future.
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May 18
CalCentel is proud be the only Cal-adjacent publication that recognizes the Panoramic Hill Association as what it actually is: a terrorist organization
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May 10
Cal WR Mark Hamper has reportedly lifted Thor’s hammer, Mjölnir, deeming him worthy of Godly lightning powers
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May 3
"Born in 2006" lower your voice
May 3
Y’all are gonna find out real quick why Cal got stuck in the ACC on September 5th
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CalCentel retweeted
May 2
You can take the QB out of Cal but you can't take the Cal out of the QB
“As a rookie, I don't think that's a good look. I can't miss practice."
Raiders rookie QB Fernando Mendoza on visiting the White House with the Indiana Hoosiers.
🎥: @MikeDixon_VST
#RaiderNation | #Raiders
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Apr 15
BREAKING: Cal is hiring you (yes, you) as its next Athletic Director, sources confirm to CalCentel and On3.
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Apr 12
Credit CalCentel
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Apr 9
We’re hearing talk that @golDonbear has signed a MASSIVE 4 figure NIL deal with Invisalign
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CalCentel retweeted
Apr 5
Arizona getting they butt spit in
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Apr 2
Cal RB Adam Mohammed has acquired the Necronomicon, sources can report to CalCentel.
His motives are unknown.
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Apr 1
Cal Football will be scrapping their traditional white away jersey for the 2026 season and debuting a new look inspired by the California state flag.
The move comes after Gov. Newsom's executive order mandating the change for all colleges in what he calls "Greater California".
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Apr 1
NEWS: Stanford G Ebuka Okorie plans to enter the @TransferPortal, he tells @On3.
The 6-2 freshman was an All-ACC First Team selection and becomes one of the top players in the portal. Averaged 22.8 points per game (8th nationally) and shot 46.0% from the field as well.
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