NovaScotianAdultMan
Joined June 2009
- Tweets 16,667
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91 Photos and videos
Mar 7
I’ve begun working on an important novel called, 𝘋𝘦𝘣’𝘴 𝘚𝘩𝘦𝘥. The story focuses on Deb going to her shed and looking at old tools and other belongings. 800 pages. No plot. No dialogue except for one moment when Deb grunts at a leaf blower.
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Mar 5
As soon as a novelist starts describing the curtains, I’m out. Reading is bullshit.
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Jan 29
Fascist pedophiles and authoritarian regimes got you feeling down? Well, don’t give up hope just yet because Canada negotiated with China to lessen tariffs on canola seed! Everything is going to be ok. Picture Mark Carney dancing, soaked in canola oil. Never give up.
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10 May 2025
Education Update: I heard the following exchange between my students at my college:
“How are finals going?”
“Yo, bro, I’m fucked, bro.”
That’s poetry, Josh.
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10 May 2025
You’ve got ears. I’ve got feet. Let me tell you about my foot issues.
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10 Apr 2025
Teaching update: A student took a semi-concealed call right before my literature class to tell another student who was on the way that there was no pop quiz. It was like Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol.
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10 Apr 2025
Teaching Update: April is when I usually start telling my students about my foot issues.
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14 Mar 2025
Contemporary Literature: “The characters in my first novel are, like me, doing an MFA at a prestigious college. It’s about their trials and tribulations as they, like me, do an MFA at a prestigious college.”
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20 Feb 2025
Teaching Update: What kind of a world do we live in when 17-18 year olds are showing little to no interest in odes?!
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6 Feb 2025
Today on the subway, two young people in their 20s started singing together, and I said, "Don't fucking sing" louder than I meant to and they stopped singing and I felt bad and now the children are sad and music is dead.
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1 Feb 2025
Organize the class based on the size of the students' heads. Lecture on whether head size determines intelligence. Wait until the end to say it doesn't then whisper, "However, there is a small positive correlation." Explain the word "correlation" to the kid with the smallest head
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Darb retweeted
3 Dec 2024
What are you doing tonight? May I suggest carving some time to get creative???
If you want, join me at YouTube.com/tlemco at 630pm ET where I’ll be making art and listening to some funky tunes.
Tonight is Collage Night! Bust out some old photos or magazines to chop up.✂️
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14 Nov 2024
Teaching Tips: Begin your lecture before you even enter class - do it somewhere on the staircase as you approach the hallway to the room where your students await, hearing you coming, then burst in, sweaty & agitated, mid-lecture. Never end this lecture; leave while still talking
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14 Nov 2024
Teaching Update: Saw a student just fucking devour an apple today, just charging teeth-first into fruit with youthful abandon, chomping out a sound so deafening, it drowned out my lecture on some shit that suddenly didn't seem as compelling as watching that apple mercilessly die.
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1 Nov 2024
Teaching Update: On Fridays, I like to celebrate a "quiet student of the day" by announcing, without warning, that student's name. Then we all just stare at them for a bit.
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1 Nov 2024
Teaching Update: When students stay too long during my office hours, I start telling them about my acid reflux, particularly the dysfunction of my lower esophageal sphincter.
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