The funny side of my job with real life tweets! @secrettourpro wishes he had this gig! #secretassistantpro
Joined August 2015
- Tweets 1,931
- Following 79
- Followers 8,428
- Likes 838
241 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
The only other person in living history who was able to move sand more efficiently than @PReedGolf
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Secret Assistant Pro (insert Blue Tick here) retweeted
17 May 2024
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Shawshank Scheffler has arrived ready for his round!
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Tag a mate who will go into a shop, sit down and chat about their round (which was no doubt a shower of shit) before they forget to buy a round and leave without putting money in the hustle pot. #everygolfclubhasone
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Secret Assistant Pro (insert Blue Tick here) retweeted
15 Dec 2023
Re tweet if you fancy a game at the home of golf in 2024 😍🤞🏼
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I’m struggling to concentrate on your swing given the blatant disregard you have for hitting in front of the rope. You’re better than that, come on Paige.
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Secret Assistant Pro (insert Blue Tick here) retweeted
13 Dec 2023
Rate my golf swing on a scale of 1-10
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This is going to divide the masses but here I go….Juniors are not the future of golf. Big John who is desperately trying to get 10 more yards is the future of the golf business. He’s had 3 drivers this year alone. Let’s all be more like Big John!
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Time to put those beef curtains away! Big day tomorrow! #SolheimCup2023
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Struggled to serve today under excitement of the #Serloincup Beef curtains everywhere!
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The only positive to come out of todays #SolheimCup2023 was the fact Laura Davies hasn’t been commentating.
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It must be a good idea with the size of the crowd it’s attracted!
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Can you actually call yourself a real golfer unless you walk into a shop and ask for one of their ‘free’ pencils?
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Bravo Ali! A job well done! Great to another set of DIY String Tees out of the game! #notallheroswearcapes
20 Aug 2023
Found these on the course @Tauntongolf . If they’re yours you’ll find them in the bin on the 10th
#MrTee
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Phones going onto night mode from 13:00 today until Monday morning. Don’t bother calling whilst the #Masters2023 is on.
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Anyone else got a member who is so under the thumb you know he has to ask his wife to have a wank?
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Tis the season for Subscriptions. I love hearing the guys that play 5 times a week moan it’s gone up 10%.
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Serious debate in the pub tonight!! Who will win a major first?
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Tiger
21%
McIlroy
67%
Rahm
8%
Homs
458 votes • Final results
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I have been watching Full Swing and @Joel_Dahmen is class! I would travel (a long way) to beer hard with this guy!
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Our recent committee meeting had a lengthy discussion about whether to introduce free towels in the shower. I suggested this fella and let the money just flow in.
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