The Covert Comic isn't like you. The Covert Comic is love you.
Joined November 2009
- Tweets 6,177
- Following 2,460
- Followers 1,230
- Likes 1,758
474 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
Jun 5
“According to studies, 55% of communication is nonverbal,” she kneed.
– Tradecraft
NEW intel from the source that brought you 'Life's Little Covert Operations Manual.'
Climbing up Amazon's free comedy list. Download FREE now!!! amazon.com/Tradecraft-John-A…
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Jun 13
Whoever put the second S in the KISS principle added 33% needless complexity.
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The Covert Comic retweeted
Espionage is my middle name. Going through TSA is hell for me.
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1 Sep 2014
I finally wrote an e-book. That was hard. Next time, I'm going to use all the vowels.
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*rips napkin off neck of my shirt
THIS DATE IS OVER
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I suffer fools gladly by appointment only.
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May 5
We should have gas-powered windmills by now.
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Jun 13
This morning I was downtown, and I happened to glance at an office building just as it was deliberately imploded.
For a second I thought "Whoa, did I do that?"
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Jun 13
If the dumpster’s on fire, might as well toss in your trash.
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Jun 10
A guy just stuck a pin in me and I heard a doll yelp out in pain.
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Jun 9
You can only buy used mirrors.
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Who is the real monster here? The giant radioactive fire breathing lizard the size of a skyscraper, or the producers who forced him to make movies?
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Jun 12
RT @tara_266273: *opening gift* Plausible deniability! You shouldn’t have! And officially, you didn’t.
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The Covert Comic retweeted
20 Apr 2023
Tweet like you were released due to overcrowding.
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Jun 6
I read the Cannibal Manifesto. The part where it says they like to eat people is on page 289.
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Jun 5
A clenched fist cannot shake hands, let alone operate a belt-fed weapon.
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I’ve decided to become sentient.
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