Joined November 2009
- Tweets 9,001
- Following 424
- Followers 308
- Likes 24,472
2,624 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
6 Jun 2022
Being an astronaut on the moon only requires that you identify as an astronaut on the moon.
Simply dress like an astronaut and add a hashtag to your bio.
#manonthemoon
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CNN is going to be running headlines when they find one town in Iran that still has power and a few random cars driving around bomb craters in the road.
"Trump promised to return them to the stone age, but we found 1 Iranian man with a sat phone and a solar panel."
Apr 2
خیلی استرس دارم نکنه برگردیم به عصر حجر اینترنتا قطع بشه، همه ی دنیا تحریممون کنن مردم رو هم تو خیابونا قتل عام کنن!
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In a way it's comforting to see that Iran has hillbillies too just like the U.S.
Apr 3
Bakhtiari tribes in Khuzestan headed into the mountains, rifles in hand, searching for the missing American F-15 jet pilot — saying:
“Don’t worry, we’ll find him.”
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Mar 25
Remember Baghdad Bob?
Now we have Tehran Ted.
Mar 25
🇮🇷🇺🇸⚡️– Spokesperson of the Central Headquarters of Khatam al-Anbiya:
"Considering that all American bases in the region have been destroyed, American commanders and soldiers have fled and taken refuge in hideouts outside the bases, and we are searching for them.
We ask the people of the regional countries to report their hiding places and simultaneously demand the expulsion of Americans from the region for their own security."
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Mar 19
So Jake Tapper is saying that people born 20 years after slavery are not responsible for slavery?
Mar 19
FWIW Prime Minister Takaichi was born 20 years after Pearl Harbor
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Mar 13
Apparently Biden was more dangerous to oil prices than the Iranians.
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Jan 27
There is like a 400 year backlog of unburned witches ever since they cancelled the Salem witch trials. We have been dealing with the consequences of this now for over a century.
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2 Dec 2025
Call it the "War on Drugs" and everyone applauds.
Fire a missile at the drug suppliers, and everyone loses their mind.
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24 Nov 2025
Truthfully this occurred after Jerry's draft picks.
23 Nov 2025
And just like that we ended the cowboys season
GO BIRDS !!
Community note
Philadelphia did not end anyone’s season or blow the cowboys playoff chances.
The only thing they blew was a 21 point lead allowing 24 unanswered points for Dallas to secure a win.
si.com/nfl/eagles/ons…
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Some beach ⛱️ somewhere retweeted
23 Nov 2025
My certificate just arrived, thanks @elon
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20 Nov 2025
It’s me, hi, I’m the bomber, it’s me
At jihad, everybody agrees
I’ll stare directly at the blast but never in the mirror
It must be exhausting always rooting for the martyr-hero…
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20 Nov 2025
Really expecting the comments to blow up on this one. 😂
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8 Nov 2025
ACA is free. Lies lies lies, look into my eyes eyes.
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26 Oct 2025
If nothing else comes out of this, we're all getting a crash course on the history of the White House, down to the last tree and shrub.
Satellite images show President Trump's project to build a grand ballroom has appeared to take down at least six trees on the White House grounds — including two historic magnolia trees commemorating Presidents Warren G. Harding and Franklin D. Roosevelt. abcnews.link/j5jABHe
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17 Oct 2025
Forget the Tomahawk cruise missiles. We need to give Zelensky a couple more suits.
Zelensky now at White House with Trump
US President gives him a back pat
Wearing same black outfit as last visit
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1 Oct 2025
Just so ya'll know, I'm a veteran now. Thanks Pete.
30 Sep 2025
Hegseth calls out “fat” troops and generals. He says going forward, every service member will need to pass the physical test twice a year if they want to remain a member of the armed services.
He says being a fat soldier is “unacceptable”.
He’s correct.
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16 Sep 2025
Robert Redford, dead at 89. His gif will live with us forever though.
nbcnews.com/news/obituaries/…
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Some beach ⛱️ somewhere retweeted
27 Nov 2016
You can tell a lot about a person by how they react when someone dies.
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