😂😂😂bado tunangoja jibu mamae

that phase where you slowly start hating your girlfriend is crazy😭

Mzazi akiona ushapata pesa zako na hawezi kucontrol anymore anaanza kukwambia uoe ndio bibi aendeleze mtindo😂

😂😂😂

Na tukunyoroshe mbaya sana

Sidechicks hufikiria ati married men are with them because they hate their wives .Msichana, bibi akigundua this illicit relationship ntasema wewe ni shetani umetumwa kuharibu ndoa yangu na tukukemee as the homebreaker you are

Helicopters seem to exist solely to kill celebrities and politicians

Unaeza pata sio kupenda kwake,ni omena akonayo inatakanga kuswim

Hizi ni vitu at the back of my mind ningependa kufanya but I have very dramatic baby mamaz. Tunaeza enda hizi trip upate amejirusha ndani ya mto bana

Sometime back this girl I was seeing suggested we go to this Restaurant in lavington for lunch,which I agreed,but lemme tell you maina I have never sweated like that. Kwanza Menu ililetwa namna hii sikua naelewa kitu,its like it was written in greek. The only thing there that I have ever heard of but never tasted,was fish fillet. Tukaitisha iyo. Kidogo tena nikaangalia nyuma mrembo,nikaona kweli huyu ule jamaa anaitwa Irungu Houghton, with a woman im assuming it was his wife. Irungu Houghton is the president for Amnesty Kenya. I just knew the bill would be in dollas bwana Then I did my litmus test. Nikapiga survellience nikaona hakuna mahali naona Speaker. Lakini wimbo inaimba. Na si reggae ama Dumbolo,ni zile zinaitwa House music,za matajiri. Hizo huwesi skisa ukiwa bedsitter aki. I just knew I was finished. Bill ilikuja nakwambia ilikua inasoma 7660 kenya shillings. Celestine Ndinda,I just want to say I am sorry for ghosting you after that day. You we’re going to impoverish me,in days,not weeks. I dont deserve you Weh! Hii nairobi kabla uamue kutongosa wasichana ya matajiri,ni muhimu ujiite mkutano. Jiulize utawezana? Sasa kama huyu alimaliza pesa ya sofa set yangu in 2 hours. Woi! Na ananitolea meno akiniambia thanks for lunch. I have seen things in this concrete jango. Si rahisi aki

Last night,or rather at the dawn of this day nilipigiwa kuraushwa,and guess what,ni wezi wa kuku wameamua kuniosha one more time.Enyewe men na violent thieves hukua na guts sana maumbwa.fvck them brokies na sio ati nn.

BREAKING: Elon Musk officially becomes the world’s first trillionaire.

Afrika tunaikamia tu mos mos bana.

Bibi ya wenyewe anakutext 'I'm Pregnant dio mfanye coparenting ama?I'm just a firefighter na wewe unatake serious,auch😭😂😂

Fun fact:ukiwa na uwezo wa kueka full tank you are free to travel this country as much as possible bila struggles mob esp at night. Thing is,ni muhimu ujue the roads to use and the ones to avoid.

Siet,we are fvcked on a men's mental healness month.

Skills zimepita ukulima wa vitunguu huko Israel

Unaacha shamba yako ushago ikiwa unattended na ikikaa vile inataka alafu unakuja na tingatinga kupiga farming huku kwa Elon Musk.Dio maana millenials wanafeel mbaya ni juu ya kutumia easy,and affordable digital means to earn some dollars.

Naambianga Mwanaume the Moment your girl tells you ‘Im pregnant’,stop whatever you are doing and start scheming. Start arming yourself like you’re going to war. Manake hii kitu inaitwa mimba ina swara mingi sana ata kushinda Maasai mara. If you drink,stop! If you gamble,stop! If you do nonsensical road trips,stop. Start saving. Because you will need it. The first thing that happens when your wife gets pregnant is jobs get lost. Wale wa free lancing. Kazi zinapotea nakwambia unashangaa kwani namna gani. Others get fired. The most un anticipated misfortunes you never thought of happen when you have a baby on the way. Kuna spirit ya mimba huwa inawachiliwa huko jehanamu ikuje ikutese ndio mtoto akikuja apate mambo ilichemukia baba yake alipotea. I call it the spirit if Singo mathahood. Chesa!

Life has no balance.Inafika time ukona pesa ya mzinga na kupiga sherehe proper the next minute unafuliza indomine usilale njaa.