Adapting your style is wisdom, losing your spine is weakness. Leaders who become whoever the room needs produce brittle culture and followers, not direction.
If your real self is an obstacle to being a leader, there's a much deeper problem lurking below the surface.
I used to believe leaders should always show up as their authentic, natural selves.
I donโt believe that anymore.
As a leader, you need to be a chameleon at times, changing your approach depending on what the situation needs.
For a long time, I thought my role was to show up, discern, and decide. I assumed that was what good leadership looked like.
Discern & decideโฆ
Discern & decideโฆ
Thatโs the job (or so I thought).
But what I started to notice is that many people needed something else first.
They needed warming up.
They needed reassurance.
They needed empathy.
And in order to provide those things, I had to slow down. I had to stop assuming my natural way of showing up was the right way.
I had to change my approach from:
โWhat needs to get done?โ
To:
- How is everyone feeling right now?
- What do they need?
- Am I actually meeting them where they are? Or just where Iโm comfortable?
Leadership, at its best, isnโt about being yourself 100% of the time.
Itโs about being who others need you to be when they need it.