Find my frequent columns on Substack. Ex-columnist and other stuff at The Oregonian, Portland Tribune, NBC Sports NW. Played a reporter on "Portlandia."
Joined February 2009
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In this country, soccer is the sport of the future -- and always will be.
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All true
I'm from Texas. Here are some helpful tips for Knicks Fans: What You Should Know Before Visiting San Antonio:
1. It's not cheese dip. It's queso.
2. Sweet tea isn't a beverage. It's the official wine of the South.
3. "Bless your heart" is not always a compliment. Context matters. A lot.
4. If someone says they're "fixin' to" do something, no repairs are involved.
5. A breakfast taco is a perfectly acceptable breakfast, lunch, dinner, and late-night snack. Get one asap.
6. The speed limit is merely a suggestion to the pickup truck behind you.
7. "Y'all" is singular. "All y'all" is plural.
8. No, you cannot survive June by "just walking a few blocks."
9. The Alamo is smaller than you imagined. Don't say it out loud.
10. If a local says, "It's not that hot today," and it's 96 degrees, they mean it.
11. Guacamole is considered a vegetable.
12. The phrase "Texas-sized" is not marketing. It's a warning.
13. You may develop strong opinions about salsa before the weekend is over.
14. When someone waves from another vehicle, they're being friendly. Wave back.
15. Chili does not contain beans. This is not a debate.
16. If you ask for "just a little spicy," the outcome is entirely at the restaurant's discretion.
17. Texans put hot sauce on things that already contain hot sauce.
18. Cowboys exist, but most Texans commute by pickup, not horseback.
19. A 20-minute drive can somehow be 35 miles away.
20. If someone offers homemade brisket, cancel your other plans immediately.
21. H-E-B is not a grocery store. It is a way of life.
22. The stars at night are big and bright...!!! Yes, people will expect you to know what comes next.
23. "A little outside town" can mean 45 minutes away.
24. If you hear, "Well, that's interesting," it may mean the exact opposite.
By the end of your trip, you'll be saying "y'all," ordering queso, and arguing about barbecue like you've lived in Texas your whole life. Welcome to Texas - stay safe and enjoy the game!
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The story was that he would have been in MLB longer but they could not find anyone in those days who could catch his great knuckleball. A great guy.
Jun 13
Remembering former MLB pitcher Bob Tiefenauer who passed away on this date in 2000. He had a good year pitching for the Milwaukee Braves in 1964. That season he made 46 appearances; picked up 4 wins, recording 13 saves with a 3.21 ERA.
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
The Knicks are 10-0 in their last 10 games with Scott Foster as the lead referee.
Guess who’s the lead tonight. (h/t @MrBuckBuckNBA)
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None of our owners ever have been.
Was Paul Allen a Portland resident?
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
Why is Portland and its publicly owned, substandard arena an attractive place for an NBA team? No one can tell me…just “they’re already here” and “because”. All competitor markets would me more lucrative, with growth potential. Portland’s dying - all the data shows it.
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
Two things about soccer:
1) The flopping is crazy.
2) I know why they sing and chant so much. Most of the game is so boring the crowd needs to entertain themselves. 😂😂😂
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There are no other people like me.
In a world filled with people like Dwight Jaynes, choose not to be a dickhead
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Soccer history.
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
John Stockton > CP3. Had to be said.
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
So the $7 trillion of our money that that the government took and spent last year solved every problem seven times over?
I think that would’ve made the news.
A trillion dollars could solve virtually every problem. Any problem at all. But instead it’s all just going to Some Guy
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
Maddux > Pedro. Had to be said.
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
I’ve been writing about the apathy at City Hall for over two decades. I was way late to the party, too.
It’s well past the point of voting ourselves out of the situation they put us in.
I’m not confident the City will do the right thing regarding the Rose Garden.
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
Jun 12
Waiting to board our flight in Washington and there are 3 Scotland fans in kilts walking past. An American lady says" I love your skirts"
"They're nae skirts lassie they're kilts , We're Scots not Trannies" I genuinely Lol #tartanarmy #fifaworldcup @jk_rowling
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I was talking about how they got there from KC
19h
Nah. Not worth arguing about something neither of us can prove. But Sac is a bad example to rely on. They had a local billionaire step in to keep them there and a former NBA player mayor advocating to keep them. Portland has neither.
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
A sticker!!! Hi guess what I gave $250 and they gave me a sticker!! Put a stick in my eye please if I did that
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Dwight Jaynes retweeted
Jun 12
Elon responded to Warren calling him a “freeloader" in 2021:
“I'm actually paying the most tax that any individual in history has ever paid this year. Ever."
"And she doesn't pay taxes basically at all. Her salary is paid for by the taxpayer, like me. If you could die by irony, she would be dead."
Jun 12
2021. Elizabeth Warren calls Elon Musk a freeloader and falsely claims that he pays no taxes.
A week later it was revealed that Elon would be paying over $11 billion in taxes for the year.
Meanwhile Warren continues to contribute nothing to society.
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