#TimWilson offered $100 "Gift Card" to "Five Lucky Residents" from Goldstein, IF you fill out his "BIGGEST" survey.
What a fuking clown. Who the fucking Goldstein needs 100 bucks from Tim Wilson?
The card reads "FIVE LUCKY RESIDENTS
WILL RECEIVE A $100 GIFT CARD
In appreciation for sharing your views, five lucky residents drawn at random from surveys returned before 31 May 2026 will receive a $100 gift card.
Yours sincerely,
[Timmy The Titwank] < For clarity, we added that bit.
We are not sure who posted the image of the card, but that image appears below. Thank you to whoever posted it.
Well, given I have a property in Goldstein, and technically, I do live in it, just not very fucking often, I decided to play his silly game.
I don't want the hundred bucks, I don't need the hundred bucks, I just wanted to see what the fuck his survey asked.
What’s interesting is once you actually read the survey, it stops looking like a “community consultation” and starts looking like a campaign tool disguised as one.
Most of the questions aren’t designed to understand what people think in any neutral sense, they’re structured to force you into pre-selected ideological boxes. You’re repeatedly given narrow, value-loaded choices like “wasteful government spending”, “too much union power”, or “back to basics in schools”, with no real space to express nuance or mixed views.
It’s less a survey and more a multiple-choice argument, where every option quietly nudges you toward a familiar Liberal framing of the world: lower taxes, tougher crime, scepticism of unions, concern about debt, and resistance to climate costs framed as personal financial pain.
Even the “how much would you pay for net zero” question is framed in a way that reduces a complex national economic transition into a personal wallet hit, $0, $200, or $500, as if that remotely captures how policy actually works.
So while it’s presented as “listening to residents”, it reads more like:
→a messaging test for campaign talking points
→a way to reinforce pre-set narratives rather than discover new ones
→and potentially a data collection exercise that sorts people into ideological and demographic buckets
That’s where the $100 “gift card draw” starts to make more sense too. It’s not really an incentive to “hear your views”, it’s a mechanism to maximise responses so they can be filtered, segmented, and reused.
In that sense, the survey feels less like civic engagement and more like a political advert with a feedback form attached.
NB:
Yes, we did fill the form in. No I am not Angus Taylor, but it is a name I use as a pseudonym at parties where there might be Liberals [I have the business card]. Yes, we used a valid email address: Angus@defecation.one and no, we did not give him my phone number.
Oh, and of course, we used an industrial-grade VPN. Because we know exactly what these pricks get up to.
The only sad thing is I should've set the VPN to the Cayman Islands instead of a suburb in Melbourne. Fuck, that was a missed opportunity.