I've had my fair share of VC horror stories too.
But dunking on VCs from one-off bad experiences is such a cheap take. The more interesting question is why it happens a lot.
I briefly worked as a VC before. Having been on the inside, my take is that a lot of the bad experiences from founders come from the incentives of the job, not always from bad character.
Let's start with portfolio math. A VC fund lives on power laws. Out of a portfolio of, say, 40 companies, one or two will return the entire fund. Everything else barely moves the needle.
The VC can't tell which one you are. Predicting who breaks out is nearly impossible. Companies break out of nowhere, suddenly, years later.
So you have a job where only the outliers matter, and no way to know who the outliers are. The only rational play is to keep every door open with everyone and occasionally commit.
That's what ghosting, slow nos, and "let's stay in touch" actually are. It's not rudeness. It's often optionality.
It also explains the thing every founder has felt: walking out thinking the meeting went great, when it didn't.
When I worked as a VC, I was explicitly trained to make the founder feel like it's the best meeting they've ever taken, even when we thought they completely bombed. It's deceptive, but it's game-theory optimal.
Why close a door you might want open a year later?
Founders play a role in this too.
A great founder knows how to run a "reality distortion field." Grandiose vision, clean narrative, a story that vastly understates how messy the real world is, all to pull in investors, talent, and customers. The best ones are incredible at it.
Now picture being on the receiving end of that all day. Pitch after pitch, every founder feeding you the rose-tinted version, the vastly simplified and high level worldview, sometimes just straight-up lied to. It's a terrible information diet.
You end up in an echo chamber where everything is vision and narrative and nothing is ground truth. That's where all the floaty, high-level VC speak, that founders hate, comes from.
Live inside enough distortion fields and your own sense of reality drifts.
The horror stories are real. And yes, there are genuinely bad people working as VCs, same as there are bad founders.
But it's not a profession of villains. It's a job where the incentives subtly reward this behavior. Put most people in that seat and they'd do the same thing.
I was once pitching in a board room at a top 3 VC firm for a $15M Series A.
12 people in the meeting. One of the GPs fully fell asleep. Out cold for 30 minutes. Nobody acknowledged it. Everyone just kept going.
I kept presenting my Series A slides to an unconscious man in a Herman Miller chair and somehow that was considered normal. That's venture capital.
You might fly across the country to perform for people who may or may not be conscious.
It's a dance.
And sometimes you lead and sometimes you follow and sometimes your partner is unconscious.
If you're raising right now, just know: every founder has a story like this. The process is weird. The power dynamic is weird. You're not crazy for thinking it's weird.
No one talks about it because they want to continue raising. But I'm happy to stick my neck out there.
It is weird.