Artist, archaeologist, elitist penguin hater

Joined October 2008
Photos and videos
27 Jul 2013
I'm all like, why are people staring at me, geez people lay off, and then I'm like, oh yes, I'm wearing a shirt with a chihuahua in a tophat
1
10 May 2013
4 chickens died for my meal. Or 1 mutant chicken
26 Apr 2012
Arial font? Psssh, more like "burial" font.
3 Mar 2012
Coming home to my apartment on a hot humid day, when I haven't turned on the ac, is like stepping into someone's mouth.
1 Mar 2012
Why does science take so long?!
27 Feb 2012
Almost as good as crystal's cow voice in City Slickers.
27 Feb 2012
Robin williams and colin firth had a baby, and it's this guy.
27 Feb 2012
That's a Herbert Hoover, or a Waring Hudsucker #oscars
10 Feb 2012
Ugh, superlatives are the worst!
8 Feb 2012
Spent a good deal of lunch today mapping out on a chalkboard the divergent timelines of the Planet of the Apes universe.
7 Feb 2012
I just wrote an annoying and pointless email to campbells to complain about the msg in their soups. Pointless, but it woke me up a bit.
7 Feb 2012
For some reason, the term "love knife" has come up in 3 different circumstances today.
4 Feb 2012
@GameOverMike They're going to start turning against each other soon. Possible murder plots.
4 Feb 2012
At an old fashioned bbq place during a tornado. Classic Mammet.
2 Feb 2012
I have a strange love for Roger Miller. I'm an old man.
31 Jan 2012
Replying to @yoHyphen
@jheydasch I had gotten out of the habit. But I'm back, yo!
1
31 Jan 2012
Hello, twitter.
2
16 Sep 2011
I think the Jam's "Start!" is the better version of "Tax Man".
15 Sep 2011
George HW Bush is to George W Bush as Bud Light is to Bud Light Lime.
12 Sep 2011
If I were a real hipster, I would switch over to listening to lo-fi surfer rock.