I’m not good at golf but I would likely still beat you
Joined September 2022
- Tweets 29,420
- Following 147
- Followers 486
- Likes 21,284
1,236 Photos and videos
This is what bro took from me celebrating my playing partners 😂
You people are insane
You are the biggest douche-canoe on golf Twitter. Tell us your family doesn’t love you without telling us your family doesn’t love you 🤣
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Dude you don’t have to do this
Phil Mickelson’s gifts to the golfing public are far, far greater than any of his supposed indiscretions
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It’s definitely Elons fault 😭
Jun 12
I am 52 years old. I have been working since I was 15 years old. I have no savings, no retirement, and will never own a home before I die.
And there is now a trillionaire.
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Why are all of you so fucking miserable and jealous?
✅ Brand new golfer tweeting every single round they play
✅ At a Top 100
✅ Apple Watch
✅ Nike logomaxxing
✅ Zero-torque putter
✅ Cargo pants
✅ Beard
✅ Print shirt
✅ Can’t-putt-for-shit grip installed
✅ ”Hey man, can you snap some pictures of me playing so I can post later on the gram? Thanks, bruh.”
Solutions? There are none. Like our porous border, we’re cooked.
Seethe all you want. This is the new normal.
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Lol y’all just say shit 😂
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Y’all don’t even like golf
I know because anything longer than 3:45 and you don’t even enjoy it
Just go racing man, they have a lot of different racing
15h
why go to therapy when you can dew sweep in 3:45 with 3 of your closest friends
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It’s easy to see who’s a terrible playing partner 😂
What do want them to do? Suck his dick right there on the tee box?
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Lmfao why a fucking absolute douche bag thing to say
I guarantee nobody likes you
Most good golfers have seen a lot of aces and are pretty laid back about making one.
If you and your friends want to jump around like a bunch of teenage girls, that’s cool too.
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When is the Senior US Open?
I believe that’s the one he cares about more than any right now
Jun 12
🚨🐅👀 #BREAKING — Tiger Woods is OUT of rehab and has arrived back in the United States after more than two months overseas. According to Polymarket, there’s a 43% chance he will play a PGA Tour sanctioned event in 2026.
Think he tees it up?
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How many times are we gonna see “they’re lucky our real athletes play other sports”?
Does anyone think for themselves anymore?
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Jun 13
The average golfer doesn’t ever hit a 4i
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Jun 13
No fucking way this is real
I react more than that when my playing partner makes a birdie putt
These dudes all act like they saw 4 aces that day
What a shitty ass group
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Jun 12
I’m personally glad to see FAFO still lives
Fuck these people man
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Jun 12
No chance this MULTIMILLIONAIRE is complaining about no retirement benefits 😂
Ben Affleck says actors have no job security because 130K people are in the actors union and only 30,000 work each year
"I got real cold and had a couple of movies that didn't work... all of a sudden it can be kind of over for you"
"there's no seniority, there's no tenure, there's no retirement. There's no gold watch"
"if your show doesn't work or your movie doesn't work and nobody wants to hire you, they're just gonna hire someone else"
"there's 130,000 people in SAG and there's only 30,000 people that work every year"
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Jun 12
Wisconsin*
Jun 12
The nicest people in the world live in Kansas
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Jun 12
The “purists” are sick about my lucky shirt not being cotton
Suck a dick bitches
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Jun 12
Lmao we will just lure you north into the snow
Then we will just drive away and watch y’all wreck yourselves repeatedly
Jun 12
2 would win before lunchtime.
Against 1 and 3.
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