One time when I was like 11 my dad took me to an Italian restaurant and the waiter asked what my name was and I said “Sam but you can call me captain ravioli” and my dad just looked at me and said “what the fuck was that? don’t do that” and I’ve been chasing that high ever since.

Deadbeat stepdads be like “I’m the dad who stepped up. And then down again.”

If I were a celeb I would make sure I was caught wearing this shirt by paparazzi all the time. TMZ would be like “she’s wearing the Ma shirt again.”

Unfortunately sick as hell

Hotter take: therapists in TV and movies are rarely good at their jobs because it would make for a boring story.

Eating in Mexico coming from England or Scotland has got to be a transcendent experience. Like seeing colors for the first time

just found out about the official tubi pride merch that they had at weho pride😭

i hope elon doesn't let the money change him

I'm loving all the videos 😂🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

i like how for a certain set of millennial women “go piss girl” has become an automatic polite social response in the vein of saying “bless you” but for peeing

But taxing wealth so normal people can afford to see a doctor and not go bankrupt over inhalers is radical left. OK

Honestly, i don't understand this economy when nursing homes are so expensive they bankrupt our grandparents but nursing home aides need to use food banks. daycare is so expensive it eats up one parent's entire paycheck and yet daycare providers only make $10/hr and need second jobs. college costs hundreds of thousands of dollars and puts students into debt for life and yet we have thousands of professors living in their cars. everything we need is astronomically expensive and yet almost none of the money we pay is going towards the people actually doing the work and providing the services.

Taylor Swift and Mariska Hargitay literally reenacted the Scottie Pippen-Michael Jordan Flu Game pic

the concept of knowing who the haim sisters are but not knowing mariska hargitay

Don’t get it twisted (or do)

Love when a series flashes back to the main character’s ancestors’ life around the 6th episode of the season to explain why everything is happening present day. Time for a field trip!

I’m sorry but Taylor Swift and the Haim sisters showing up to the NBA finals with pun shirts and the SVU lady is objectively funny. If you’re enraged by this, you will not make it through the upcoming cringe renaissance.

*in the room at the the museum of the moving image in Astoria that plays The Muppet Show 24/7* This is where I come to think

Says a lot about our society that gays get an entire month and disclosure only gets one day.