partner in cake @drinksandbites Cheshire. #wifesforlife 🌈#mochaswiththecrockers #lchf #keto
Joined April 2009
- Tweets 2,364
- Following 258
- Followers 225
- Likes 56,251
173 Photos and videos
Gemma Crocker retweeted
8 May 2025
Do you think there’s an amount of money the Vatican would accept to let you use the Conclave chimney to do a gender reveal
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
7 Apr 2025
Never, in the history of publishing, has so much human misery been created by one book.
🤣🤣
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16 Jan 2025
RT @gardengirl125: My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like a cunt
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
15 Jan 2025
FFS…..barely over Christmas and the shops are full of Valentines Day presents already….😤
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
16 Jan 2025
One minute you’re young and wild, the next you’re declining an invitation to sit on a beanbag because “I won’t be able to get up again!”
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
15 Jan 2025
Thread of the most stunning cafes on Earth 🧵
1. New York Café, Budapest
ALT Photo by Joe Thomas
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
14 Jan 2025
If you’re looking for a new job, feel free to borrow this list of interests from my own CV.
Interests
-Sitting quietly
-Taking the bins out in a timely manner
-Looking in the fridge
-Sending memes to my two friends
-Crisps
-Cheese
-Shows about murder or baking
-Dogs
-Hot drinks
-Biscuits
-Looking out of the window
-Potatoes
-Toast
-Visiting supermarkets
-Commenting on the weather
-Avoiding people
-Going to bed
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
1 Dec 2024
When something says it needs 2 minutes in the microwave but 40 minutes in the oven it does make you think a little bit about wtf is going down in the microwave
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
Take That is short for Take That Enormous Child Outside Please
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
6 Nov 2024
Thought I'd jump on the bandwagon 🤷🏻
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
23 Oct 2024
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
18 Oct 2024
The horrifying reality of being a woman, perfectly summarised by @_CaitlinORyan
If you give even the slightest shit about women, watch it all. This is what it’s like.
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
6 Oct 2024
I’m using this for everything.
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
4 Sep 2024
Little tip: If you’re looking for something fun and cheap to do in the UK right now why not try going to bed at 5:45pm
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
2 Sep 2024
Somebody posted this insane Spotify playlist of every track on: Now 1 - 114 (1983 - 2023) Now That's What I Call Music 1 - 114 spotify.link/KyKMUhaazMb
And it’s like a lifetime of cultural archaeology. I might listen to all 228 hours of it.
Currently reliving my university years.
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
13 Aug 2024
Thread of the most surreal villages on Earth 🧵
1. Marpissa in Paros, Greece
ALT 📸: minogiannisvalantis
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
3 Aug 2024
When you’re about to win an Olympic medal but your massive d*ck gets in the way while the whole world watches in slow motion. x.com/nocontextgayy/status/1…
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
18 Jul 2024
i cut together the best egg scenes in movies
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Gemma Crocker retweeted
6 Jul 2024
I’m so thrilled! And it looks gorgeous – as do you two!
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