WHEN AMERICA ASKED ME TO BE THE FACE OF SOCIAL SECURITY, I ACCEPTED. NO ONE IS MORE SOCIAL OR SECURE THAN ME. UNLIKE DONNY WHO'S THE FACE OF SOCIAL INSECURITY: HANDS, WEIGHT, HAIR, MANHOOD, CROWD SIZE, ME. THIS IS DONALD'S FIRST CARD SINCE HE'S NEVER WORKED A DAY IN HIS LIFE. TO SCARE HIM, I'M ADDING HIM ON IT. (PEOPLE ARE BEGGING ME TO TAKE HIM OFF. IT'S CAUSING NIGHTMARES, MIGRAINES, DIARRHEA.) JUST FOCUS ON THE HANDSOME MAN IN THE MIDDLE, NOT THE ELF IN THE CORNER. TO EVERY WORKING AMERICAN, ENJOY THE CARD! YOU'VE EARNED IT! --GOVERNOR GCN