Things that hadn’t been invented when Sir James Anderson took his first wicket in the County Championship: Fire Stone tools The wheel Mathematics Agriculture Organised religion

A hilarious April fools video made by the police

My hero Spike Milligan died on this day in 2002. Comedy has never been the same. If he ever made you laugh, RT & LIKE. Let’s make sure the timeline remembers him today. @goonchild4

Every football club on earth exists because of this island. 🇬🇧 Kings banned it. The richest schools in England claimed it. They wrote the rules and locked the gates. Then the working class stole it back. In 1850, Parliament passed the Factory Act. Work stopped at two on a Saturday. Working men had free time. And they chose football. Churches formed clubs to keep men out of pubs: Aston Villa, Bolton, Everton. Factories formed teams from their own workers: West Ham from the Thames Ironworks, Arsenal from a munitions factory. The FA Cup Final. Blackburn Olympic: weavers, spinners, a plumber. They beat the Old Etonians 2-1. No private school team ever reached the final again. Then British workers carried it everywhere they went ⚽🌍 Scottish miners in Spain founded its oldest club. A Nottingham lace trader gave Juventus their black and white stripes. A butcher's son from the same city founded AC Milan. British railway workers in Uruguay named their team after Stephenson's Rocket. Cornish miners founded Mexico's first football club. A schoolteacher from Kent taught the game to his students in Argentina. His school produced Lionel Messi. A boy from Southampton brought two footballs to Brazil. They call him the father of Brazilian football. Real Madrid are said to wear white because of an English amateur team. From Lancashire cotton mills to every continent on earth. Three and a half billion people watch football. The most popular sport ever created. And it was created here. By the British people. Every Saturday, three o'clock. That kickoff time exists because of the Factory Act of 1850. The moment working men were given an afternoon off. They chose football. And the world followed. No owners. No sponsors. Just supporters. Be part of us. 👉 proudofus.co.uk/support 🙏 Be Proud Of Us. 🇬🇧

It is time for King Charles to commence his personal rule. Arrest his brother and Peter Mandelson, exile the entire Government front bench to Mauritius, reintroduce the "beauty of holiness" to the Church, enforce the Book of Common Prayer in the parishes, and invade France.

A quiet Sunday, 24 March 1985, at Tunbridge Wells West, a few months before it closed.

Crunch time for Starmer as he realises that the only one left to throw under the bus now is Larry The Cat, and he's seen off five Prime Ministers.

RT @HealeyCartoons: #Planetoftheapes premiered on February 8, 1968, at the Capitol Theatre in New York City. Fuck's sake... linkedin.com/in/coolnalu…

That’s odd because here is David Lammy describing Peter Mandelson as a “man of considerable expertise” and the “right man” to be the US ambassador. Looks like he is trying to save his own skin.

Don’t ever forget …

Harriet Harman lobbied parliament, on behalf of the Paedophile Information Exchange, to legalise filmed child sexual abuse as long as the “model” did not appear “harmed”. Keir Starmer made her a life peer in the House of Lords and the UK’s Special Envoy for Women and Girls.

Get ready for some Labour mental gymnastics. Harman ran the Peadophile Information Exchange. It campaigned for the abolition of the age of consent. She now sits in the Lords, rewarded by Starmer She now says Starmer appointing Mandelson was wrong because Epstien was a Peadophile

Harriet Harman was a Labour MP for decades. She is now a Lord. From 1978 to 1982 Harman was legal officer at the National Council for Civil Liberties, which was the predecessor to campaign group Liberty. The Paedophile Information Exchange (PIE) - a group that promoted adults raping children - was granted affiliate status with the National Council for Civil Liberties in 1975. She had no issues with it from a legal perspective. This is the British Establishment.

In 2012, an Icelandic television station (Channel 2) accidentally broadcast an episode of Teletubbies with Icelandic subtitles intended for The Sopranos.

On this day of remembrance. ✡️ I don’t know their names. No one alive does. I know they were my grandfather’s extended family in Ukraine. And I know they were murdered. They perished. They’re remembered without my knowing their names. I’m here and they’re not forgotten. 🕯️

Considering playing this in full during my 9-11pm @GBNEWS show x.com/Deadferrets/status/180…