I am. functional addict..... but aren’t we all????TheFunctionalAddictpodcast@gmail.com tell me your story....

Joined January 2020
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I always wanted to get into the porn industry. I finally just invested into cocktail sauce.
What is happening in Cuba is a preview of what’s coming to the US. Praying for the people #FreeCuba
My job just let us take off our masks. I was hired last November. People be uglier than I thought. All peoples #maskless
Cosby case overturned! Break out the jello and date rape drugs! What a country! Sad day people #BillCosby #CosbyCase
Charges be dropping like women be dropping around Bill Cosby #BillCosby
I just signed up for Dr. @davidasinclair's new test that will tell me how fast I'm aging — thought you would want to know too! Don't worry, I won't tell! doctorsinclair.com/?r=az1JT

I just signed up for Dr. @davidasinclair's new test that will tell me how fast I'm aging — thought you would want to know too! Don't worry, I won't tell! doctorsinclair.com/?r=az1JT

Libs for 4 years said the election 2016 was rigged by the Russians. Was that just motivation to rig 2020? I don’t know why they r loosing their shit over republicans questioning this election? “It’s damaging the country” wtf did they do for 4 years? Same shit.... I hate politics
I’ve always been a skinny dude but put on 10lbs during COVID. Idk how you Pound Puppies walk around like this much less wipe your own ass! #PoundPuppies
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I got shit going up my back!!!! Finding it 3 days later like a dusty ham sandwich between the couch cushions....
I had a “near LIFE experience” last night doing stand up. #comedy
Started naming my shits after car models... yesterday was a Charger after Mexican for lunch.
Do 18 wheelers really need all 18 wheels? I think they are just trying to make up for something.....
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Replying to @marknorm
@marknorm not a jk. I will b your assistant. I’m a system engineer, hate my life, best driver I know. Will move your car every 15 mins. Will book travel, no bs. Need a change man!
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@marknorm I’m your assman! If not I’m going to Austin with all the other douches. I will live in the car, keep it impeccably clean, and I will walk your pussy! and the cat too!
Film it! “Ass Normand” got my own laptop!
Pay me whatever you think it’s worth at the end of the week. I’m almost 40, so responsible don’t get too fucked up. Ready to work!
Growing up gay in the CIA NEW SHOW ON NBC THIS FALL!!! I can’t wait!!!! Humans of CIA youtu.be/m7_PGYgmcPo via @YouTube

When did #MothersDay become Dads responsibility?
Nature calls to me like a red headed orphan calling for his momma... #ThursdayThoughts #thursdayvibes