The Iranian navy, which has been destroyed eight times, has apparently closed the Strait of Hormuz again, because the United States, for the seventh time, won the war that wasn’t a war, so now the United States has to open the Strait of Hormuz that was already open before the not-war began. The not-war began because Iran had uranium that was totally, completely, beautifully obliterated, so they can’t build the nuclear bomb they weren’t building, which is why the United States had to start the not-war it definitely didn’t start. Now the United States, which has nuclear weapons, is threatening to use nuclear weapons to stop Iran from getting nuclear weapons, because nuclear weapons are far too dangerous for countries with nuclear weapons to allow other countries to have. If the United States saw the United States doing what the United States does in other countries, the United States would invade the United States to liberate the United States from the tyranny of the United States.

A black guy pulled a knife on Gary. Gary stomped him out in return. Be like Gary.

They're haggling over whether Schoen should hold Harbaugh's beer every day with pinky out or pinky in.

Mara: John, we’d like you to be the new Giants head coach. We’ll give you literally anything in the world you want Harbaugh: oh great. Can we get an updated medical staff? Mara: what? No. Off limits. Rodeo and Barnes are highly respected Harbaugh: oh. Ok. Can I pick my coordinators? Mara: nonsense. We preselected your coordinators. Antonio Pierce and Davis Webb. Two true Giants. Harbaugh: um… okay… well how about the front office? Can I bring some proven winners from Baltimore? Mara: no way! My nephew Timmy is well respected and Kevin Abrams is a cap wizard! And Schoen? I mean my god. The nucleus of young talent he brought in. Harbaugh: If all these in-house guys are so well respected, then why do you continue to lose? Mara: we’re just a head coach away. Everything ever wrong with this organization always falls on coaches laps. Obviously. Never the front office. Harbaugh:… okay. I’ll um… I’ll get back to you

Nobody in the US Congress wants to be the first to stop applauding Netanyahu or to sit from their standing ovation, for fear that AIPAC will pour $15 million into their race to remove them as punishment. So they all keep clapping like seals until he tells them it's OK to sit:

Dave Chappelle: "The fear I have that I need you to protect me from is co-option. What if they make me say the things they want me to say? So just in case we need a code. If I say it you know they got me, and don't listen to nothing I say after. The code is: I stand with Israel."

Repost to help me make my first Pro Bowl. Thanks for the support! #ProBowlVote @allforgod_55

But you could live anywhere. You said so yourself.

The Zionist cabal goes through all the trouble of building her up into a defender of free speech, finally maneuvering their agent to control a major news network, and Bari just goes on camera like the Israeli version of Johnny Depp in Once Upon a Time in Mexico

The population of Western Europe fell 30-50% during the 14th century. Sadly, after this Western Europe was never historically relevant again.

Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene announces she will be resigning from Congress on January 5th, 2026:

If you renew your PSLs this year, you are part of the problem too. x.com/Giants/status/19901643…

Take note.....x.com/mtaibbi/status/1967300…

Japan is a small, densely populated island nation where land is insanely expensive. Wouldn't it benefit future generations of Japanses people if their population was a bit smaller?

I admire the guy who's county is in far better shape today than it was when he took the wheel. At this point, I care more that you get it done than how you do it. x.com/CountryFirstRep/status…

How wild would it be if every member of Motley Crue turned up deleted over the next year with ants crawling out of their noses?

🚨 AFFIRM "YES"

Will any of you Shedeur fanboys need a wellness check if the Browns pass on him at 33? I mean, we've been trying to prepare you for reality the whole time, but life goes on.