When I was in eighth grade I was voted the quietist and shyest in my class. Also the most ambitious, (because I stayed in the library at recess and read books).
I struggled terribly with social skills. Rarely started a conversation and definitely couldn’t keep one going.
So the summer before I started high school I took a part time job at McDonald’s and I sold Avon products door to door.
I practiced in front of the bathroom mirror on how to smile, say hello and then add conversation.
It felt awkward, very uncomfortable and even fake!
But I just didn’t want to stay the shy girl no one liked. I was determined to not be the target of bullies too.
High school would be with people I had never met before. This was my chance to change things.
By the end of summer. Between my jobs and the practice in front of the mirror I had found enough social skillset to build on.
In time it got easier and I liked the new me!
It was years later that I realized that it wasn’t just Autism that had made me so shy. It was years of severe abuse from my parents that had squashed any personality to a pulp.
Oh by the way, my sophomore year I was Keyclub sweetheart. I also made Captain in Jr. ROTC in my junior year.
I had friends, liked by the teachers, and made good grades.
High school gave me the foundation to continue my life path forward.
But it was my determination to practice until it got better. Surprise! I actually liked who I was afterwards.
So in time, all that practice became normal and even natural.