So they are using tax dollars to reconstruct the things tax dollars destroyed?

This drop should've been released on a Tuesday, since Garfield hates Mondays 😏 #mtg

The official line is that they were a Norwegian trade delegation. Technically accurate, because they are Nordic, and there was trade. But they are also seven feet tall, telepathic, and arrived on the South Lawn without a vehicle. I am the Deputy Director of Visitor Logistics at the White House. I logged them into WAVES as FOREIGN DIGNITARIES (3), NON-TERRESTRIAL, NO MOTORCADE REQUIRED, and the meeting went extremely well. The Pleiadians requested the audience in March. They communicate telepathically, which the President respected immediately, because it meant nothing was in writing. They traveled 444 light-years to deliver a warning about our trajectory as a species, the kind of warning a doctor gives a patient who keeps asking if he can smoke in the waiting room. Atomic weapons. Ocean collapse. Machine intelligence. I did not take complete notes, because the meeting ran 25 minutes and he spent the first eleven asking where they got the jackets. Their opening offer: clean fusion, the cure for every disease, the propulsion equations. Free. Contingent on planetary disarmament. His advisors begged him not to negotiate against a species that reads minds. It turned out he is the one man alive with nothing to find. They reached into his mind expecting layer upon layer of deception and found a single image, perfectly clear: him, wearing one of their jackets. The delegation conferred for a long moment and informed us that in eleven thousand years of contact, no species had ever tried to buy the uniform. They called it coherence. They did not mean it as a compliment. He has already trademarked it. He countered. Landing rights, retroactive to 1947. Eighty years of unauthorized airspace use, invoiced with interest. Legal added a line item for the weather balloon story. Narrative services. We billed them for our own cover-up, and the tall one went silent for nine seconds, which I am told is how their species weeps. Greenland stays in the deal. They did not want Greenland. He said that's how he knew it was valuable. What kind of advanced civilization passes on waterfront? Then UFC Freedom 250. This Sunday. Seven bouts on the same lawn we were standing on. His birthday, which he assured them was a coincidence the universe keeps arranging. He offered them galactic distribution rights. Then he looked at the tall one for a long time and offered him the co-main event. Seven feet. Reach like a cathedral door. Walks around at a weight our scales log as an error. Someone said the commission would never sanction it. He appoints the commission. The tall one declined. He lowered the offer to the prelims. This is a negotiating technique. They asked if staging a cage fight on the negotiation site was a threat display. He said it was a Flag Day celebration, and also yes. I should note that an environmental group has sued to stop the octagon. Nobody has sued to stop the aliens. I forwarded this to Counsel as proof that the permitting process is working. Protocol required a gift exchange. They presented a small silver sphere that shows the holder the full consequences of his choices. He looked into it for four seconds and asked if it came in gold. You have all seen the photo. A groundskeeper took it through the magnolias. We told the press pool it was a costume rehearsal for a streaming series, and the pool, to their credit, wrote that down. The groundskeeper now works at the Department of Energy. I am told this is a promotion. There is also footage. He spotted the camera mid-meeting and pointed at it the way you'd point at a waiter whose name you intend to learn. Instead of having it confiscated, he licensed it on the spot. The leak is now official merchandise. Every time you share it, a royalty accrues. You have probably shared it. Have you checked? He thanks you for your business. The deal collapsed at dusk. The Pleiadians withdrew the fusion offer when he asked them to walk out before the main event as Special Guests of the Octagon. They said humanity was not ready. He had Counsel log that as a verbal option to renew. Final tally: our species declined the cure for every disease and counteroffered with pay-per-view. The delegation received two tickets to the Ellipse screening area. Not cageside. He does not give away cageside. They left without sound. One moment present, then elsewhere, like a fee disclosure. Two things before Sunday. The walkout jackets for the main card are red with gold embroidery. Licensed. The fusion fell through, but the jackets closed in an afternoon. And there are three seats on the South Lawn logged as HOLD, GUESTS OF THE PRINCIPAL, DO NOT ASSIGN. I did not enter that hold. The system says I did. He says everyone comes back to the table. We're the only planet with the belt.

If you earned $10,000 a day from the dawn of humans 300,000 years ago, you'd have earned less money than Elons wealth. Tax this shit out of billionaires (and one trillionaire)

So thinking?

We got this folks! June 10th will be remembered as the day we Saved Stargate! Keep going until we #SaveStargate !

hey @wizards_magic, is this article wrong in saying that the Fantastic Four Collector Commander decks is the only full surge foil deck? magic.wizards.com/en/news/an…

Trump booed very loudly here at MSG

Because they are already trash and don’t need to spend money on a sponsorship

Hey #liftbound, here is a 10kg PR at 160kg (352lbs) which is about how much I weighed when I started lifting again last year @playriftbound

Doom and Age of Empires creator Sandy Petersen blasts Amazon over their handling of Stargate: "1) get handed a massively popular IP that spans 17 years of successful shows." "2) realize it has millions of loyal fans, desperate for more. They are now in their 40s and 50s, flush with money. Eager to teach their kids & grandkids about Stargate." "3) you could start with this. You are already three steps up the ladder to huge success. The fans will evangelize it, if you don't wreck the IP. Don't believe it? Look how the fans evangelized Battlestar Galactica after its 30 year hiatus. And the initial Dr Who reboot after 15 years." "4) cancel the project because you want a "new take" that will eliminate all the loyal fans and turn them into bitter enemies." "It's like an ancient Greek play about hubris." Why are corporate execs like this?

Amazon just cancelled the new Stargate show because... *checks notes* ... The people who like the show would have really liked it. And that's not enough.

🙋‍♂️I also dispute their claim

Yeah, I am waiting for streaming now

Americans realizing they're starting the Cuba war to distract from the Iran war disaster which was a distraction from the Epstein files disaster

Wow, toilet paper is getting expensive again. $250 for one sheet is a rip off

CEOs are quietly realizing the AI replacement plan has a problem. Two problems, actually. One: the token costs for running AI agents are now exceeding what they were paying the employees they fired. Two: when the tokens run out, the AI stops. Just stops. No continuity. No workaround. Just a spinning wheel where your workforce used to be. You fired humans to save money and bought a subscription that bills you into a corner. The employees you let go knew what to do when things broke. The AI just invoices you for the outage. And then there’s the permission problem nobody wants to talk about. To do its job, the AI agent needs access. Full access. Your systems, your patents, your contracts, your future plans. Everything you spent years building, handed over to a process that has no loyalty, no discretion, and no skin in the game. You didn’t hire a replacement. You gave a stranger with no soul the keys to everything you own. Enjoy.

if I had a nickel for every time a theatrically released Star Wars film connected to a tv series had a plot revolving around rescuing Rotta the Hutt, I’d have two nickels which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice

I almost pulled the full jungle out of my last @playriftbound unleashed box.

Me, until I inevitably pass out at 9:00pm on a Thursday night