Joined March 2011
536 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
4 Sep 2024
Replying to @yacineMTB
remember kids: do not play dota2 until you're retired
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ok... maybe i get it now kristina.
The autistic urge to ask why
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Everyday we see real things from the government that the writers of Veep couldn’t come up with on an Ayahuasca retreat
🚨 SAFETY ALERT: Ambassador Herschel Walker has an important message for Americans visiting The Bahamas: Jet ski rentals pose a serious risk of injury, death, and sexual assault. U.S. gov't employees are banned from renting them — and you should avoid them too. Watch. Share. Stay safe. ā¬‡ļø
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looks like pink lemonade was invented by a clown and the original batch was balls and asshole flavored. good news tho, clown's dead
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corey retweeted
Gotta be honest, this @ufc event at the White House looks spectacular. This is a big time show. I’m not there, and we all know all the complaints folks had about renovations at and around the White House, etc, but — to be fair — this is some impressive stuff I’m looking at. Props to UFC President @danawhite and the show they’ve put on. It’s Bigtime. Plain and simple!!!
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corey retweeted
Retiring at a young age sounds great in theory until you realize all your friends still have jobs and you’re forced to spend your weekdays hanging out with boomers.
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corey retweeted
it’s gauche to complain about the management, and yes, none of us are ever leaving this place. but it’s unfortunate how much the signal is lost in the noise these days this used to be the app all the smartest people were addicted to. that’s still true, arguably but when every other post is dating discourse, fake reddit post discourse, snuff film, politics discourse -- you start to feel the evaporative cooling and nowhere else has the sauce either. we’re all lapping from the last drying puddle
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corey retweeted
Replying to @___frye
Monetization killed this app tbh. Created incentives inversely correlated with quality content. Still far and away the best option, all said though
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corey retweeted
the greatest blow elon dealt to this app, intentionally or not, was killing simclusters in favor of an undifferentiated content feed everyone’s performing for the same algorithm now. there’s less value in building a following, or a subculture. you can feel it. non-viral content doesn’t get an audience and eventually people give up on it
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corey retweeted
Going to work is embarrassing. You’re basically letting everybody know you need money.
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corey retweeted
ā€œHow has playing Magic improved your life?ā€ Well, whenever I see ā€œup toā€ on an ad for getting cash back I immediately get sus and assume it’s $0 most commonly.
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corey retweeted
🚨Married dads engagement on the home front has *tripled*. "Married dads of young children in 1965 did, on average, less than 10 hours a week of any kind of child care or help around the house. Dads in 2024 contributed nearly 30 hours a week." @lymanstoneky
"For decades, researchers have argued that a key source of falling fertility was that men didn’t help out enough at home. [But this] Father’s Day, it’s worth noting that this theory is almost certainly wrong: today’s dads do more than ever." @lymanstoneky ifstudies.org/blog/american-…
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corey retweeted
Replying to @vers_laLune
A military guy once told me there are only 2 types of helicopters. 1. Those that have crashed, and 2. Those that haven't crashed yet.
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corey retweeted
Trying to imagine the coverage if Obama had spent $60 million to host a pay-per-view NBA event at the White House where LeBron called Melania a hooker.
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corey retweeted
Is the twitter Gore classifier offline or something? Jesus Christ I just saw a person die and a naked man get beaten by the police. I dont want to see that shit
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corey retweeted
After having a kid, it’s just so funny to think about single people taking a vacation to unwind Unwind from what? Sleeping in?
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Replying to @MorganBarrettX
It really is just one big club at the top
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corey retweeted
If climate change isn’t real, then how do you explain the emergence of four of the last seven Stanley Cup winners?
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corey retweeted
Jun 14
you really never can predict which white people can speak mandarin
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corey retweeted
I appreciate how Japanese cameramen haven’t been Camera Cucked.ā€ They get all up in there, switch the view around, like ā€˜Yeah, look how hot she is…Check her out from this angle…and this angle…’ šŸ˜…
šŸ‡ÆšŸ‡µ Japanese speaking Dallas Cowboys cheerleader cheering for Samurai Blue at the World Cup 🫶
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corey retweeted
Fun part of this World Cup is learning about all these specific ethnic enclaves in the US, every game has some cut that’s like ā€œand here’s the famed CuraƧaoan community in Wilmington, Delawareā€ and it’s some random bar with like 450,000 people
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