I have worked so hard to give you guys joy and be beloved
Joined July 2010
- Tweets 8,092
- Following 181
- Followers 124
- Likes 5,220
1,005 Photos and videos
Acapellant retweeted
Jun 10
The World Cup tourists have discovered Buc’ees
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A government agency spending $300 million in taxpayer dollars to produce sterilized flies sounds like a dream scenario for a DOGE team looking to cut waste, fraud, and abuse. newsmax.com/platinum/screwwo…
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Acapellant retweeted
Jun 6
“I’m Jake Tapper, tonight correspondent Laura Loomer dives into Hunter Biden’s deranged trolling, Kellyanne Conway reveals Joe Biden fell asleep watching TV again, and Ian Miles Cheong confirms Biden is the reason he’s never left Malaysia. Those stories and Catturd, tonight.”
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Acapellant retweeted
Jun 3
I’m Kid Rock.”
“I’m Naomi Wolf.”
“I’m Kanye West.”
“I’m Matt Taibbi.”
“I’m Catturd. Those stories, plus Rob Schneider, tonight on 60 Minutes.”
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May 29
She thinks “Independence Day” is about… America. I guess in 2026 the case could be made given we elected an Abusive Orange Daddy, but I doubt that’s what she’s trying to say here.
May 29
The woman who got rich and famous off of the song Independence Day won’t show up for the 250th anniversary of America on the National Mall in Washington D.C.? And then used some PR firm to put out this copy and paste
statement ? Pathetic.
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May 28
This should be Brady list material. “You have a history of doubling down when you make a mistake, honest or otherwise. Isn’t that right?”
May 27
A one-armed woman has gone mega-viral after she quickly refuted a cop’s claim that she was driving with a phone in her “right hand.”
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May 28
I hope Kirby is getting paid here
May 27
Cereal Without the B.S.
You don't need a breakfast with bright mascots or sugar bombs. We keep things simple with real fuel for real life.
2.5g Creatine. 15-16g Protein. 5g Carbs. 0g Added Sugar.
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May 27
In 2026 the opposite is true. Mr. Wonderful is living in the past. youtube.com/shorts/FurWKk0h5…
Kevin O'Leary says Apple's genius is making people pay 5x more for a laptop they could buy for $350
"you can buy an Apple laptop, average price about $1,800, or you can buy the same functionality for $350 on a Windows laptop"
"but you still pay $1,800. Why? Brand"
"you're paying a 5x multiple in some cases for something that is exactly like a Windows machine"
"I put that out to people, they say, yeah, but it's not an Apple. So there is the genius of Jobs"
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May 27
RHOA needs to branch out into Law and Order-style sub-genres. @Andy is leaving money on the table here.
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May 25
I’m about to be exposed as cheap and free of FOMO.
May 24
OnlyFans is Hacked 🚨
Apparently OnlyFans has been hacked and they're selling the complete database of 340 million users
including data of content creators and consumers.
The leaked data includes
- Usernames and profile names
- Email addresses
- Phone numbers
- Account creation dates
- Follower/subscriber metrics
- Creator/fan rankings
- Linked social media profiles
- Partial payment card metadata (last 4 digits of the card)
The result of this is going to be a massive wave of extortion attempts against users
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Acapellant retweeted
May 24
My body is a machine that turns domestic beers and grilled meats into respect for all of those who have served
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May 24
I get the feeling no one who was asked turned down a role in The Boroughs
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Acapellant retweeted
Jon Stewart predicting our current media landscape back in 2001:
"We're all gonna get fired by the same guy one day and it's gonna be like a freaky genetic cross-breed between Dolly the Sheep and one of Murdoch's kids and it'll just rule AOLTimeViacomWarner" 👀
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May 20
Every time I see "9-0" I want to point out that it's really 8-1, but I don't want to encourage them.
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May 20
If I had voted today instead of weeks ago, I might have left one race alone entirely instead of voting for judicial incumbents all the way down. Further affiant sayeth not.
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Acapellant retweeted
May 19
Kind of a wild fact I just learned: not a single Democrat from the Georgia General Assembly has endorsed Keisha Lance Bottoms.
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May 20
The next six years would have been torture for Jen Jordan, striving to keep promises while the rest of SCOG is striving to reach the right result under Georgia law.
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Acapellant retweeted
❌Doge check
❌Tariff check
👍 Insurrection check
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