I'm a mom, an aspiring novelist, and a political activist.
Joined November 2013
- Tweets 91,617
- Following 2,176
- Followers 23,350
- Likes 177,001
304 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
8 Jun 2022
Nobody has ever been more surprised than a husband hearing about his wife's plans for the second time.
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Laura Marie retweeted
Jun 11
When something is advertised as โFun for the whole familyโ Iโm like u have no idea what the members of my family are capable of complaining about
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Jun 11
A new Science study suggests that variables linked to socioeconomic statusโsuch as increased stress and reduced sleepโhave strong relationships to brain structure and function in children.
The brain differences observed are unrelated to genetic ancestry, say the authors. They also may not be permanent. scim.ag/4ouWxcM
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Jun 9
"Look with your eyes, not with your mouth," is the parenting phrase you didn't know you needed.
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May 28
1926: Children should be seen and not heard
2026: Children should be screened and not heard.
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Laura Marie retweeted
Me: Hey, can you print this black and white document?
Printer: I am offline.
Me: No, you are not. Can you please just print this black and white document?
Printer: With my MAGENTA low??? Bro, you sound insane right now.
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When Iโm eating shared nachos Iโm always thinking 3 nacho moves ahead of my opponent.
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May 14
put yourself in my crocs your honor
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Laura Marie retweeted
Website: That was the wrong password.
Chrome: I will save it for you.
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May 3
You're doing your kid's homework, I'm writing my kid's group chat messages. We are not the same.
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I am lucky enough to have a 4 day work week. My boss doesn't know but that's not important
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May 2
getting older is crazy cause you just start thinking differently out of nowhere
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May 2
no fucking way the only way out is through
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May 1
life is so exciting i was just in my bedroom and now i'm in my living room who knows where i'll go next
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May 1
And for the lady? Perhaps a living wage?
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May 3
RT @DaddyJew: puts phone on dark mode
Phone: death will be but a sweet embrace after experiencing life in this dreary world
Me: whoa, a lโฆ
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Laura Marie retweeted
I need a hobby. A real hobby with a community. Not you idiots, I mean something else
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Laura Marie retweeted
I'm ending my feud with Stephen King. Life is too short, man.
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